#2402 - Miranda Lambert

[00:00] Joe Rogan podcast, check it out! The Joe Rogan experience. Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day! [00:12] I'm training by the desk. The desk is a mess because my mind is a mess. [00:16] I wish my mind was the best. [00:18] how it works. Is that how it works? Yeah, I think so. Is that the excuse we use? I don't know. I'm trying to make myself feel better. I think that's the excuse we use for each other. Yeah. I'm a creative. It's my go-to default. Is the compression on? [00:32] Something sounds weird. Oh, it's just really loud. [00:35] Something happened? Maybe my ears got better? What happened? You can hear now? My ears aren't very good. Sometimes I, you know, when I'm underwater for too long or I swim or something like that, and then I forget. [00:46] that my ears have water in them and then they come out like, Oh, there's that moment where like, Oh, this is how I hear. I feel like I have the in-ear monitors for my job. Oh, right. I still like, I've been using them for, I don't know, 20 years. I'm still not used to them. Like I, [01:02] Come from like honky tonk world where you can hear everything. Yeah. Hear the room. Well, it's so good that people have them now because, boy, so many people I know from back in the day are almost deaf. Oh, yeah. I'm so glad we have them. It's not the same. [01:19] I mean, you don't feel the energy of the room, but it's a good hearing. It's a good trade off. You can hear enough. It's a good trade off. And so many of my friends who shoot guns, too, same thing. They started hunting when they were kids and no ear protection back then. And you say something to them and they're like, what? They're all half deaf. Yeah. My dad is a police officer and he's – I swear that's why my parents are still married. He can't hear at all. And the dog ate his hearing aid and he never replaced it.

[01:49] Is that on purpose, Dad? That's hilarious. That's hilarious. Yeah, you definitely develop an ability to shut up. [01:55] things off yeah otherwise because men and women think and communicate differently and if you want your wife to communicate with you the way your buddies do then will you marry a dude yeah okay so if you want to be married to a woman you have to listen like listen and everything both ears and sometimes it's like round about journey to get to the point and you can't go what the fuck are you talking about because they're like oh my god why are you so hostile so you have to go okay okay [02:25] Collective hearing. But my husband will like, I'll say it. And I'm like, say it back to me. And I found that when I do that, it's worse. I'm like, say what I said back to you. Get bananas at the store. So he comes home. I'm like, where's bananas? I didn't get any. So don't repeat it. Just hold it in there. [02:45] That's hilarious. He blocked it out for himself. Yeah, exactly. That's very funny. Yeah. The hearing thing is kind of nuts that no one knew. [02:55] Like, it just makes you wonder, like, when did people, when, I wonder when people were aware that like loud music. [03:01] was going to kill your hearing. I don't know. Like... [03:05] Just, I mean, I'll... [03:07] I've had the in-ears for a long time, and they did save all of our ears. But it's like, I think that... And then, like, the longer you go, like, still, even though I have those, like, I turn... [03:15] them up way too loud. I'm like missing the energy. Do you ever just say fuck it for this show? Take one out. Like sometimes when it's like a house band, you just get to use wedges. I'm like, yes, this is amazing. What's a wedge? It's just like the little on stage monitor. Oh, you know what I mean? So, but it's just so loud. I mean, it's so loud. And, um, yeah,

[03:36] I also do mounted shooting. I saw that. That's crazy. And so it's a good reminder. Like the first time I took off on the first – I just started it last year. I'm not good at all, but I love it. And I took off on my horse, and I forgot to wear earplugs. And I was like, well, I'm a musician. I should probably plug my ears when I'm shooting a revolver off of a horse. Yeah, but is it a revolver using a regular bullet? Mm-mm. No? It's black powder. [04:03] Just the powder itself? Yep. Spectator safe, horse safe. So it just sprays powder and air? At the balloon. And pops balloons? Yeah. What distance? It could shoot, I think, 15 feet. [04:17] Yards? Feet. Feet. Oh, okay. So you're just riding around on the horse popping balloons. Uh-huh. I love it. [04:25] I do. What was the origin of that sport? I don't know, actually. One of my best friends, her name is Kenda Lonsane, and she lives out in Scottsdale. She's like the 10-time world champion. Whoa, whoa, hold on. There's a world championship of popping balloons on a horse? Yeah, it's called mounted shooting. Oh. Cowboy mounted shooting, but she's cowgirl. And she's like guys, girls, everybody. She's a badass. [04:47] I became friends with her and I just never had the guts to go do it, you know? [04:52] And finally, my husband was like, stop talking about it and go out there and do it. Go out there and shoot with her. You're going to love it. Wow. And I got addicted immediately. It's just like something different. Well, it's very Wild West, right? Oh, yeah. It's essentially training how to fight with a gun on a horse. Yeah. That's all it is. Except it's the balloon as the perpetrator. But I mean, that's how you would train, right? Yeah, it's super fun. Without killing people.

[05:13] And it's like, you know, just something that, like, started a new hobby at... [05:17] 40, like it's just try to like... [05:20] preoccupy my mind and... [05:23] But [05:23] I don't know. I think it inspires me to like take a break from thinking about what I think about every single day, which is music industry, you know? So just like trying new things and, and, [05:32] Saying what the hell, let's go for it. I think that's very good for artists. I try to talk to comedians about that all the time. I'm like, pick up something, man. Yeah, hobbies are important. Play golf, go fishing, do something. For me, I play pool, do something. I just started golf, too. I'm in my Try New Things era. There you go. Did you try new things era? Yes, my yes era. Like, sure, I'll do it. Started golf, not too great yet. But I did, I just played the Ryder Cup. [05:59] Oh, nice. They had like a celebrity. Somebody heard I played golf. And when they heard that, I literally started like that day. Jamie's a nut. Jamie's a full-on golf nut. Literally... [06:10] was like, [06:10] I'm cramming my ass off like this September because I was on tour all summer and I didn't have time to practice. And you know how that feels like golf is you have to practice. And you have a coach. [06:21] I had a coach, yes. Dan, I have a coach, and he came with me as my caddy. Very helpful. But it was... [06:27] It was an experience. It was a lot of pressure. Did you feel it even though nobody expected you to win? Yeah. I mean, I just felt like... [06:35] What the hell have I done when I got there? It's like doing something you don't do in front of people. Right. A lot of people. But you do it. You just don't do it a lot. Yeah. And I do things in front of people, but it's singing. You do things in front of people, and you're really good at it. That's the difference. Well, that's the thing. Doing something that you suck at in front of people is a very scary place to be. Right. Right. Jamie has OJ Simpson's golf clubs.

[06:59] A couple of them. Not all of them. I have a few. How many do you have? It's not really awesome at all. Well, I mean. They're haunted. Whatever you're into. A couple of drivers. How many you got? Three? No, I mean, I got a whole set. [07:10] Do you use them? I have used one of them. Did you hit well? I have. That's why I use it. [07:18] Why are they blaster cars? I don't know. Well, he bought it as a goof. Yeah, it's just fun to talk about. It's a fun conversation starter. It came up. Did you get them after he died? [07:27] Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, I got him like six months ago. Yeah. I forgot. I forgot when he died. A couple years ago. Well, that's cool. I mean, hey. I guess. But it is really important having some kind of a thing that you do to take your mind off of the business. Because the people that I know where their mind is only on show business, whatever it is, music, comedy, whatever it is, they go crazy. You can eventually get lost in your own little world. Yeah. You need a little break. You do. [07:57] a writer, you got to go live to write about it. Or what are you writing about? Same shit you already said. Right. Right. It's like I need to go live a life and gather information and be around different people and sort of open my... [08:11] circle up to just [08:13] I don't know. Different experiences. Yeah, a different environment. Yeah. My friend Ari does that. He disappears for like three months every year and a half or so. Like he gets rid of his phone, gets rid of his email. He like goes off grid. Oh, he goes off grid. He goes to Asia. He backpacks through Asia. And he's famous. [08:29] He's a famous comedian, and he doesn't give a fuck. He just goes and vanishes. We can't find him. No one knows where he is. I don't hear from him for like three, four months. I just hope he's alive. Does it change him? Oh, yeah. He comes back weird. He's weird already. He's weird as fuck. Weirder. He's weirder when he comes back because he's been living in foreign countries for a long time. This episode is brought to you by The Farmer's Dog. Here's a fun fact. Research shows that dogs who maintain a healthy weight can live up to two and a half years longer on average

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[10:58] Still trying to figure out AI. The trades are about to lead from the front. Service Titan, the AI for the trades. Learn more at servicetitan.ai. [11:09] This summer, the Cup is taking over the U.S., and only DraftKings has you covered every step of the way. Follow every group stage upset, every knockout round thriller, every stoppage time moment that flips the whole tournament. Sweat all the big matches you love in real time with a seamless experience built for the world's biggest stage. No matter where you're watching, you're always connected and in the game with one app. [11:39] to get $200 in rewards within 21 days. That's CodeRogan in partnership with DraftKings. The crown is yours. [12:06] Well, I'm not, I mean, I'm just shooting balloons and swinging a golf club. Nothing as cool as that. But the thing you're doing, the thing about both of those things is they require all of your focus while you're doing. I mean, if you're riding a giant animal while you're shooting a gun, like there's no room for thinking about, oh, I got to do laundry. You know, there's no room. You just, you're just doing that thing only. Yeah, that's what I think I loved about it and got addicted to. Yeah.

[12:35] I guess I'd have to have a little bit for... [12:37] joining the circus like i did you know like yes you do it's kind of joining the circus yeah so but like i think that just that little that the focus and the little jolt right that you get of like you know that's the same kind of how we get like after a show you know it's like i still guess i need that but just in a different form yeah joining the rodeo there's there's something about shooting at things too i do archery and there's something about shooting at things that also just [13:07] really cleans your mind because in that moment while you're pulling the trigger there's no room for anything else if you're trying to hit a target there's no room for anything else and it just it pushes all that stuff away it gives you a little mental vacation yeah 100 and then you come back like cleaner what kind of bow are you shooting [13:26] I shoot a compound bow. Compound bow. Yeah. The Hoyt. Yeah. Yeah. I used to shoot bows. I haven't a long time, but. Oh, really? I got them back out during 2020. Went out all the time in the world. And my husband's from New York City. So I was like, I got these bows. I'll teach you how to shoot a bow. So we just set up the targets and got them all fixed up. And it was fun. I mean, it is fun. It's the same thing I think you're talking about. It's very similar. It's focused. It's just, even if it's just for a little while, it's that little moment in time that this is all I'm doing right now. Right. Have you ever bow hunted? [13:56] I used to be a hunter. Yeah. Yeah? Yeah, I did. I hunted for a long time. My dad. Tree stand? Yep. [14:01] Or ground blind, either way. Bow hunting was my absolute favorite.

[14:06] to do because it took the focus and it was intimate. Yeah. And it took a lot of skill and practice to make sure you're good. Yeah. Um, whitetail? Whitetail. Oh, nice. But I raised a baby deer, a buck. That's a problem. Yep. So my hunting days are behind me. He's on my heart. We found a buck with a broken leg on our property and my wife took to feeding it. Yeah. And, uh, [14:34] all of her enthusiasm for me hunting kind of went out the window it changes things yeah because it's kind of like a dog like they're he was just like a dog like they're sweet right up to you wild ass white tail deer like became like my pet and it's different than any other feral animal and that they domesticate like that they really do like he was literally i'd come home and he [15:04] because they're dumb. [15:06] Unfortunately. [15:07] I think nature has them set up to be not very intelligent, [15:11] And just food. Yeah. [15:13] And he's a beautiful food thing. Yeah. That's really what they are. Yeah. My dad, I grew up hunting with him. [15:21] Taught me how to shoot a gun and all that stuff at 17. And when I raised that buck, he was like, it's over, isn't it? Yeah, it's over. It's over. It's over. Yeah, I'll never raise a baby elk, I'll tell you that. Yeah, don't do it. I don't like elk hunting too much. Yeah. But I get it. I mean, we have deer in our neighborhood, and I see these little cute babies that are born every year. And, you know, we stop the car. Oh, my God. Especially in Texas. They're everywhere. Everywhere. Yeah. Yeah.

[15:45] Yep. And there's not any predators out here because you just shoot them. Yeah. So there's, like, these deer are all over the place. Yeah. And they're just super – unless they get hit by a car, I don't know what happens. They're, like, not affected. Yeah. Anymore. No. No. But they are beautiful. And it's just – it's cool to have animals around. Just it's cool to be, at least in some kind of form of nature. Yeah. I'm such an animal lover. I mean, I don't – [16:12] do well. Like, that's why I brought your dog toys. I'm like, I just, I just, I just, [16:16] I don't know. It's part of who I am. It's to have, especially dogs. Like that's my heart. Me too. I have a foundation called Mutt Nation Foundation. I started with my mom in 2009 and, [16:27] So far, we've raised over $11 million since then. It was like a little mom-and-pop operation back in the day. [16:33] But we just, it just has been my heart since I was a little girl. I think growing up in the country where there's just animals everywhere, whether it's deer or stray dogs or stray cats or whatever. I think it just kind of. [16:46] prepped me for [16:47] you know, when you get a platform and someone's like, "What do you want your charity to be?" [16:52] I know what it's going to be. So what does your charity do? We rescue. Well, we advocate for rescue. Mutt Nation Foundation, we don't have shelters. We lift up the arms of shelters is what we say because we – my mom and dad were private investigators my whole life. And so my mom, like – [17:08] just [17:09] because we started rescuing dogs just when I was a little girl, you know, you live in the country, people dump them off and whatever. Started adopting some from the shelter as a teenager and volunteering. And so –

[17:20] She sort of started vetting shelters [17:23] just because that's her background, you know, checking up on people, make sure they're doing what they're supposed to. And, um, [17:29] And so, like 2009, it was like, oh, I kind of started to get a name for myself, and you need to pick something that you're... [17:35] passionate about that you want to give back to. So we started it. Um, and basically we advocate for spay and neuter. We advocate for adopt, don't shop, and we, um, raise money to give to shelters all over the country. Every year we give a $5,000 grant to a shelter in every state. Um, [17:54] and try to not repeat. So there's just so many that need [17:57] help, you know, and there's so many amazing animals out there. We just try to remind people there's amazing animals out there that you don't have to go buy one. If my wife is allergic and one of my daughters are allergic, you still have two dogs. [18:12] If that wasn't the case, I'd have like 50 dogs. I can't. But yours are not non-shedders. What's that? Yours are shedders though, right? Yeah, they shed. They do. Yeah. [18:21] You just keep them clean. She's not nearly as bad as when I first met her. When I first met her, she really would get hives if she'd pet the dogs, but also... [18:31] I was not that good at washing my dogs. And they were always in the yard playing around and they were always dirty. Yeah. But if you don't have dogs, dogs are like extra love. Your love in your life will be whatever the level's at now, it'll be like 35% higher. I 100% agree. [18:47] For sure. I'm allergic to everything I love. Horses, cats, dogs. You're allergic to horses? All of it. That's crazy. I live on Allegra. Wow. That's crazy. I'm just popping Allegra to enjoy my life, but I don't care. It's worth it. One of my daughters is so allergic that we went to Rome once, and we were on this horse-driven ... They have these tourist things you do. You sit in the back of a wagon. The horse drags around the city.

[19:17] rest of the way. And we had to find a pharmacy. Oh, it was bad. She's got it bad. Did she do shots or anything? She did that. She did the whole thing, but they hated it. And when my wife stopped doing shots, then all of her allergies got way better. And she was doing shots because Texas has a lot of allergens. A lot of people that come from places like California, you don't realize it. You come here and then you get... [19:42] whammied with like i was sneezing all the way over here because i just landed you get them too you get them too i just like i live in nashville half the time and and austin half the time and i it's like the two two of the worst places for allergies i'm like oh are they really yeah oh it doesn't matter i mean i didn't know that austin was that bad and i didn't get them at all until really probably last year started how long y'all been here five years almost six so like uh [20:12] throats and I was like am I getting sick what the fuck is going on then I went to Vegas for the UFC no sore throat came back sore throat again I'm like oh damn it's an allergy it's an irritation [20:23] Because it didn't make any sense. I was like, I feel good. I feel, like, really healthy. But, like, this thing in my throat is bugging me. I'm like, maybe I've just got to be careful. Maybe I'm fighting off a cold. Because I didn't want to admit it. I was like, everybody else is getting allergies. I'm not getting them. It makes sense if you're, like, not used to the trees and the grass here. I mean, it's like, it's a whole new... [20:43] like ecosystem that you have to get used to. But the weird thing they say, it takes like three years before it hits you. And I was like, shut up. That doesn't make any sense. But it's true. Yeah, it's true. Seems to be true. Seems to get you after like three years. What do you do about it? Nothing. Just deal with it. I feel like my body's going to adapt. I feel like if I just like let my body deal with whatever these allergens are and understand what they are, it'll figure it out. I took a lot of vitamins. It'll be fine. Yeah. And it seems to be better.

[21:13] I was thinking I had a cold and then I realized it was high something, mold or fucking cedar or whatever the hell it is. [21:21] You just didn't have to pay attention to it before. [21:23] Yeah, I guess. But [21:25] whatever that is. [21:27] All the positives about living here greatly outweigh it. Yeah. I love it, too. This place rules. It does. I'm glad y'all are here. [21:34] You came in 2020 then, right? Yep. Yeah. Yeah. My little brother lives here and his husband, Mark, and he went to UT and never came home. Our little town, Lindale, Texas, representing today. Nice. It's about 80 miles east of Dallas. And so I bought a place here in 2017 and spent a lot of time in Austin. It's great. [21:53] It's a great town. I mean, we should probably stop talking about how great it is because people want to move here. Yeah. It's not that great. There's a lot of allergies, guys. Yeah. Guys, stay home. Don't sneeze. I talked to a lot of people into moving here, and I think I've done talking to people. Yeah. It's like, we're good. [22:07] Well, Nashville is our other city that's happening too, but the more the merrier really. Well, the thing about Austin is it wasn't really much of a comedy scene. There was one comedy club that closed before I moved here. It had already closed before the pandemic, or I guess at the beginning of the pandemic it went under. And so the comedy scene here was kind of empty. And when we moved here and we started doing shows here, it was one of the only places in the country where you could do live indoor shows. [22:37] like, fuck it. And then comedians just started moving here because they were convinced that LA was never going to open. And once I was here and Ron White was here, Tony Hinchcliffe was here, everybody was like, well, let's fuck it. I want to live. I don't want to be trapped in my house and not be able to perform for a year and a half or whatever it's going to be. Data brokers are invading your privacy. They're recording everything you do online. And if you live in the US, they're selling your information to anyone and everyone who's willing to buy it. But thankfully, there's

[23:07] way to stop all the tracking and spying and that's with express vpn express vpn is an app that hides your ip address and reroutes 100 of your online activity through secure encrypted servers this keeps data brokers from tracking your information protecting you from invasive advertisers scammers and even criminals and express vpn is now offering three different plans allowing you to customize [23:37] The basic plan starts as low as $3.49 a month. That's less than 12 cents a day. Or if you want all the bells and whistles, including identity protection, credit monitoring, and a dedicated IP, just choose one of their more premium plans. It's up to you. [24:07] plus four extra months of service. Go to expressvpn.com slash Rogan. And if you're watching on YouTube, get your four extra months by scanning the QR code on screen or by clicking the link in the description. [24:23] That's great. My first show back... [24:28] I think it was after like 332 days of no... [24:33] shows no bus rides what did it feel like it was at billy bobs in fort worth because like you said texas was like what covid we're gonna go do stuff we're gonna talk right now yeah so it was we did a little residency at billy bobs

[24:47] Nice. We did five shows. Did you get COVID? [24:51] Yeah, I mean, but I had it before. I had it before we even knew what it was. It's on the road. Like, I was around so many people. I was on tour. And before we knew what it was, I... [25:00] had this thing like none of my tricks worked with like all my singer tricks like steroid shot b12 iv vocal rest like just couldn't shake it and then a month later it's like oh that's because it's something real bad we've never heard of i had to cancel shows it's terrible but the show first show back was i had five in a row but the first one was like just rowdy and like so old [25:30] weird, right? It was good to miss it, though. Yeah, that's true. It was really good to miss it. Right. I... [25:37] You know, I never had a chance to. I never stopped. Country music especially. Like, we just don't. We just tour year-round. Weekend Warriors. Make a record. Tour it for two years. Do it again. Repeat. Rinse. Repeat. And I've been doing this since I was 17. So, like, just years and years of not. [25:53] knowing if I could miss it. Just... [25:56] you know, grinding. And I did. I mean, I was like, dang, I, [26:00] I miss my bus. I miss the road, which I wasn't sure would happen. Right, because it's so grating. It is. It's hard. [26:10] Yeah, I was happy to be back, but now it's back. [26:14] harder than ever. It's like just... [26:17] you know, it's a different... It hits different after 40. You don't recover as quickly. Do you ever, like, carve out vacation times? Like, say, like, for the month of December, I'm not doing shit? Yeah, that's the winter. Like, last year, I went to Arizona. I went to...

[26:35] to Phoenix area and rode with all those cowgirls shooting guns off horses and I was like, and I was just so rejuvenated and refreshed and I was like, I need to. [26:44] make that a priority. I just think none of us are good at that. If you're really driven and really goal-oriented like you are, I mean... [26:52] I have to lack. [26:53] make myself and then i'll go and say well they're working me to death they is me i'm the one adding shit to my calendar that is me my husband's like you said you were going to be off this week like well i had this one it's like so i really am making like the priority like take some winter months and you know because we start touring in the spring and don't stop till the [27:13] winter again. So I feel like... [27:16] It's, you know, it's important. It's intelligent, right? It's an intelligent thing to do, to give yourself a... [27:23] a forced vacation, some sort of a break. So just think of your creativity as like a battery. You can't run your phone until it's got zero. You've got to charge it. So stick it in the cable, put it into the wall, and then [27:37] Let it charge for a little while. Like, you got to think about it that way, I guess. What do you do for... [27:42] Your chill time. [27:44] I don't do a lot of chilling. Well, I don't. I didn't think so. I just do other stuff. [27:49] Same. I was like, I feel like you're preaching to the choir over here. Yeah. I mean, I watch TV. I like to watch documentaries and stuff. And I watch fights. And I watch YouTube videos. But I can't. [28:01] do it much or I just don't like that feeling. I feel I'm wasting time. So I have to keep myself out of time. To do other things. Well, that's the thing. It's like, I'm not just...

[28:11] you know, [28:12] going out there to chill out on the couch. I'm like, I'm in the desert doing something physical. Also, like... [28:19] But musicians, our life isn't that physical. It's kind of as far as activity. If we're writing songs, we're sitting around writing songs. We're sitting around practicing. We're standing there until the show part. So I have to make sure I... [28:35] my hobbies should be active. Yeah. You know, [28:38] Sure, just – and also do something that, like – [28:43] Active stuff stimulates your mind more. And I think active stuff will probably aid in your writing more, right? Yeah, for sure. [28:50] Yeah. Yeah. [28:51] I think so. It has to. I mean, it just makes sense. Yeah. When you sit down to – do you like sit down and write in front of a computer? Do you wait until an idea comes to you? Do you write on a piece of paper? How do you – [29:05] All of it. [29:07] Usually, like, I love to co-write. Write by myself. I'm not good at it. I encourage it for any artists I'm mentoring or anything else. [29:16] need to do it myself more. [29:18] Because co-writing is fun. You're like hanging around with – which I met you, actually, at one of my favorite writers, Benefit, Jack Ingram. Him and John Randall, my other best friend, and I, which I think you met him, too. [29:31] We have a little side project we call the Marfa Tapes, and we go out to the desert in Marfa, which is... Have you been there yet? No, haven't. It is like... [29:39] a different [29:41] That's what Rick Rubin says. It is a different, literal different world. And it's magical. I don't know what's in the air out there. How far is the drive? Is it like five hours from here? About six and a half. Six and a half. Is that coffee? Yeah, you want some? Yeah. Anyway, we'll sit around and...

[29:58] JR is an amazing guitar player. Cheers. Thank you. He'll come up with like a riff or... [30:04] Somebody has a title. That's why I like co-writing. I don't know. It's more fun to celebrate it with your friends. You know what I mean? Yeah, for sure. [30:10] I mean, some of the best ideas that comedians ever come up with, we come up with in the green room because we're just riffing. Yeah. Like there's always a moment where we're hanging around and Tony will say something. Well, dude, write that down. Write that down. Same thing. It's the exact same thing. Yeah. Yeah. [30:23] Yeah. Well, it's like... [30:26] You know, creativity is interesting because – [30:28] And you want to be inspired, and you're never more inspired than you are around other creative people. Yeah. Yeah. [30:36] especially people that are better than you. Yeah, for sure. Right? Yeah. It's like, I'm like, oh, you're a really great writer and great musician. We should be friends. [30:46] I need to learn from you and you make me look cool. Yeah. And it kicks up your desire to do better a notch. Yeah. Especially like two I've been working with. [30:55] younger artists. And I love seeing their fire, like their, [31:00] like race horses at the gate, you know what I mean? And I, and it reminds me of how that felt. And, [31:06] reminds me to find my moments where i feel that way too yeah that's great yeah i i feel the same way about working with young comedians it's important it's good it's also it's like great to see the sparkle in their eye when they do like their first big crowd you know like like come on man this is just like a regular club go out there give me some knuckles right and you see them watch them kill in front of thousands of people and they come back like whoa and you're like uh-oh now now

[31:36] I get to feel it again for the first time. I've done it so many times, it's almost kind of normal, which it never should be normal. You get to see somebody else experience the jolt of what it feels like, that spotlight in your face and all those people in the crowd. It's exciting. It is. It's a reminder. I think it's so important. [31:56] And people are like, [31:57] People ask you this. Do you get nervous? I get... [32:01] I don't get nervous. Like I get. [32:06] Anticipation. Yeah, that's a great word. I don't know. I'm going to start saying that because I was like, I don't really have an answer because I care and I want to do well. And I get like this. It's anticipation. It's not nerves per se. I think once you stop feeling something, really, you're doing the wrong thing. [32:21] No matter what it is. I'm sure you feel that whenever you get on one of those horses with a gun in your hand. Yeah. I haven't stopped feeling anything yet. Here we go. This is crazy. Bang. [32:33] I'm still feeling all those feels for a while. I'm sure. I don't know if that will ever go away, right? No. Because, you know, you're not in control of the horse. No, it's not up to you. And I think that's why I like it. [32:45] I... [32:46] I've grown to trust me in my gig. Like, I trust me. I trust my band. But mostly it's up to me. Like, I'm the one standing there in front of the microphone. And I know... [32:55] my capabilities and I know I [32:58] what I can deliver on. [33:00] a hobby like golf i'm like i don't know what the hell's about to happen when i swing this this is not up to me this little type of bitch isn't moving and i can't hit it it's just like i don't know and the same thing with the horse it's like up to my horse not it's not up to me you know i can aim and i can have the skill and be learning how to ride but it's about him

[33:23] you know? Yeah. [33:24] His name is Cool. That's his name? Yeah. With a K or a C? It's a C. He's cool. [33:30] That's a great Morris Day in the Time song Yeah [33:33] You never heard that song? No. Oh, it's a great song. I need to hear it. We have a theme song. I didn't know it. Yeah. We'll give her some of that. We'll have to cut this out. Otherwise, we'll get removed from YouTube. But play Morris Day in the Time Cool. [33:45] This is like during the Prince days. Morris Day in the Time, I think, is like one of the most underappreciated bands from that era. Yeah. [33:53] From like the early 90s. Because they got kind of eclipsed by Prince. Yeah. You know, because they were hanging around with Prince and they were part of like the whole Prince. I don't know anything about him. You don't know Morris Day in the Times? No, I don't. Oh my God. Yeah. [34:06] Play Cool by Morris Day and the Times. I'm making sure it's the right one. I got a version that says it's just Morris Day, and then another version popped up that said it was just the time. Either way, it's always going to be Morris Day singing. [34:20] I don't think the time ever played without Morris. [34:23] Morris is cool as fuck, though. [34:26] Here it is. All right, we'll edit this out. [34:29] For people at home. Sorry. Go find this. That's awesome. Is it great? Look at the clothes. Oh, it's so corny. It's so great. It's so like tugging at you. What year is that like? I don't know. It's got to be early 90s, right? 91? 81. 81! Dang. Wow. I wasn't even born on the earth. Wow, that's crazy. 1981. Wow. I was a freshman in high school. I'm an 83 baby. I was in my junior year or sophomore year.

[34:59] That's crazy. [35:02] Wow. It was a weird time back then because Prince was so big that there was like a bunch of fake princes. Like people started imitating Prince. It's almost like a lot of – That's always what happens. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Men become androgynous. There's one and then they're like, oh, let's all be like that one. So there's 20 more that aren't as good. I know. Yeah. There's a bunch of fake Michael Jacksons, I'm sure. There was a bunch of people that just tried to do something. Like what is he – how – what's that guy doing? You know? [35:32] here. Very, like very... [35:34] uniquely [35:35] Authentic. [35:36] authentically himself. So even that was like... [35:40] Trying to be too close, probably. A little bit. You know what I mean? Yeah. Not as good. That's the problem. You're not as good as Prince. You're awesome. You're great. Yeah. But Prince is like a once-in-a-generation superstar, weirdo talent from Mars. Exactly. There are those. There's some that just aren't from here. Yeah. Right? That guy was just different than everybody. You know? I remember I was delivering newspapers when I first heard a Prince song, and I was like, this is crazy. Like, who is this guy? Yeah. [36:09] It was I Want to Be Your Lover. Do you remember that? Oh, that fucking song. And it was like, this is a guy singing like a girl on stage. She's like three feet tall and all the women want to fuck him. Like, this is nuts. I have never seen anything like this in my life. What's happening? Like, what did this guy do? This guy's a sorcerer. Like, he was so talented that he could wear stilettos on stage and no one cared. Okay. And it wasn't like, boo, what are you dressing like a girl? No one gave a fuck.

[36:39] so good and so... [36:41] There's something about the magnetic power [36:44] personality that he had. There was like, the charisma that he had was like so undeniable that everybody was like, holy shit, what is this? That's not taught. That's innate. That's, you're born with that. You can't teach Prince. How do you teach that? No, you don't. [36:59] Like you grew up in Jersey, right? I was born in New Jersey, but I only lived there till I was six. Where'd you grow up? I grew up everywhere. I lived in San Francisco from seven to 11. I lived in Gainesville, Florida from 11 to 13. Lots of moving. [37:14] Yeah, a lot of moving. Then I lived in Boston from 13 to 24. Then I lived in New York for a few years. No, I couldn't afford parking, so I had to live outside the city because I'm a comedian. I had to drive everywhere. I had a lot of road gigs. That's where I made my money. Yeah. So to drive to Connecticut, Rhode Island, in the city, a parking spot was hundreds of dollars a month back then. [37:36] So I lived in New Rochelle. Okay, cool. My husband was NYPD. He retired after eight years because I drug him down to Tennessee and now Texas. Nice. And now he says y'all. Does he? He says y'all unironically? How long has he been there? We've been married seven years. Okay. After five, you're not faking it anymore. Yeah, yeah, yeah. [37:56] All your favorite NBA players are back, and DraftKings Sportsbook, an official sports betting partner of the NBA, is the place to bet on NBA stars this season. Steph Curry drilling logo threes, Donovan Mitchell taking over, and Cade Cunningham leading the next wave. DraftKings, the number one sportsbook for live betting, is live when the others aren't. Bet quarters, player props, scoring runs, and more, all while the action unfolds.

[38:26] months of NBA league pass plus score $300 if your bet wins paid in bonus bets. Download the DraftKings Sportsbook app and use the code Rogan. That's code Rogan. Bet just five bucks and get three months of league pass plus $300 in bonus bets if your bet wins. In partnership with DraftKings, the crown [38:56] In Connecticut, help is available for problem gambling. Call [redacted phone] or visit ccpg.org. Please play responsibly. On behalf of Boothill Casino and Resort in Kansas, pass-through of per-wager tax may apply in Illinois. 21 and over. Age and eligibility varies by jurisdiction. Void in Ontario. Restrictions apply. Bet must win to receive bonus bets which expire in seven days. Minimum odds required. NBA League Pass auto renews until canceled. Additional terms at dkng.co slash audio. Limited time offer. [39:25] But I got to live up there when we first got married. We had an apartment in Soho, and I'm from like BFE. [39:33] Lindale, Texas. Like, you know, Dallas is our biggest city. And it's 80 miles. So I had so much fun. Like, I just, he was still a cop, so I just wandered around all day. Like, I had gigs on the weekends, but like Monday through Wednesday, I'm just like Desperate Housewives of Soho. [39:51] Running around and like going to rock clubs by myself and having lunch by myself and having wine, meet people. And it's just, it's a city that like nobody cares who you are at all. They're just like...

[40:03] It's an amazing city. It's amazing. If you like cities. Yeah. I mean... [40:07] I like visiting cities. Six months was, I got my fill. I loved it. We're there a ton because his family's still there. But I just, I enjoyed like really immersing because I'd never done that. And I'm not really a city girl, but I was like, I'm just going to use... [40:22] every bit of this that i can wrote some great songs like wrote one called fire escape i didn't even know what that was before you know what i mean like what's fire escape you can walk out the door you know so it was it was cool it was a cool time but well that would be a great place to like rewire your brain creatively to write stuff because you're forced in a totally different environment yeah and the weirdest environment on earth in my opinion i think the weirdest [40:52] Yeah. Because I don't think that's normal at all. No, it's not. I think your whole body just goes, whoa. Like you're always at three or four all day long. Always. Like you're never at zero. Yes. My husband just now, like we literally talked about yesterday, I was like, you... [41:07] are finally like [41:10] At a regulated nervous system level. Because I think he was just used to, like, just you have to vibrate at a different energy. Yeah. Especially if you're a police officer. Like, that's a whole different... Oh, yeah. You know what I mean? And so... [41:23] Finally, like we have a farm in Tennessee and we are there for like a couple of days this week and just chilling, making cookies and being normal. And it's like he's finally like enjoying that, because even when I had my little time in New York City, I was like, this is a it's a lot of like I couldn't do this 24 seven for long periods of time because I just can't come down and like ground myself. Right. I need to touch grass. Yeah, I do, too.

[41:48] Um... [41:49] Being a cop in New York City has got to be one of the most stressful jobs in the history of the world. Yeah, I think so. [41:55] That's, I mean, that's right up there, like below being a soldier in war, like being a cop. I mean, I have friends that are cops or that were cops that will... [42:03] tell you that the people that are working in the field, like as police officers and they're going and, [42:12] They're seeing things on a daily basis. They're seeing way more carnage, way more fucked up things than these guys who had served. They did both. They were like, I saw way more as a cop than I ever did as an officer. Right. It makes sense. It's a lot. I mean... [42:26] His whole family is police officers. My whole family is firemen and police officers, too. So I think that was kind of our bond anyways. It's kind of we grew up exactly the same, just in different parts of the country. Well, I was around a lot of cops when I was a kid because of martial arts. We were always training with cops. And, you know, I'd listen to stories that they would tell me about, like, things that they got into. And they were getting into things like that, like, on a daily basis. There was always shootouts. There was always car wrecks. There was always murders and domestic violence cases. [42:56] How many of those guys are just walking around with severe PTSD and no one cares, no one respects? No one's talking about it. No. Like, they're just, you know, I think that, like, they don't even acknowledge it themselves. Like, I know my dad worked vice in Dallas for his whole career. Oof. And back in the day, like, and my husband, like, they just don't. [43:17] And then they just come home and like, you know. I'd kill my hearing aids, too.

[43:22] He'd like to dog ate it. I guarantee you that he just threw it away. He said it to put peanut butter on that fucking thing. Good job, Reclaimer. We know what you did now. [43:32] He put peanut butter on it. That's just wrong. It's just wrong in so many ways. [43:38] Yeah, man. He probably needed peace and quiet. Yeah, he needs mom to hush. Yeah, everybody shut the fucking world off. Yeah. [43:47] not the greatest pool player of all time is Def. There's a guy named Shane Van Boning. Really? And he shuts his hearing aid off when he plays. He's just... [43:54] So it's just silent. Yeah, just fuck off world. And he's just in his... People could be screaming in the crowd. He doesn't hear shit. What is it about pool? Like, what's the... [44:02] You said you play pool. You like it? I've been playing pool for 35 years. [44:06] Yeah, I've been playing forever. But what is it about that particular? Because the balls don't give a fuck who you are. They don't care what you think you are. They don't care who you know, how much money you have, what you've accomplished already, how many shots you've already made. The balls don't care. The pockets are four and a quarter inches wide, and if you don't hit it perfect, it doesn't go in, and it requires all of your concentration. [44:36] English so you're dealing with like spin on the cue ball left and right and you're dealing with draw and follow it's a dance of the mind and these orbs you're hitting a ball into another ball and trying to get that thing to go straight and it just requires this complete harmony of all.

[44:56] hand-eye coordination and your spirit. You have to stay calm while you're doing it. [45:03] That's why. [45:05] That's a very good explanation of that. I'm the worst pool player. I mean, you would think, like, playing as many honky-tonks as I have played, that I could play pool. [45:15] Most people that think they can play pool can't play pool. [45:19] Most people don't know really how to play pool. Like back in my day, it was like just the – [45:24] Place the flirt. It's that. It's that. The thing about pool is once you get down the road and you really start getting the game and understanding it and then playing in tournaments and then gambling, then you're dealing with, like, real pool players. And these – real pool players play pool eight hours a day. [45:43] Wow. Every day. You have to. [45:45] Because you know how the thing of like being comfortable on stage or being comfortable riding a horse, being comfortable like shooting a bow or playing golf, multiply that times 100 and you have pool. Because pool is the only game where you take a stick and you hit a ball into another ball. Every other game you hit a ball. [46:05] You just hit a ball with a stick. But in pool, you're hitting a ball into a ball and controlling the movement of both balls. Like the one that's hitting the ball, you're controlling how it spins off to get perfect position on the next shot. And then the other one, you want to make sure it gets the exact right angle to go into the pocket while you're calculating all the spin and the geometry of the table and avoiding collisions. It's maddening. It's very – like I just got anxiety. It's maddening. I just got stressed.

[46:35] It will drive you crazy. It's a game that will drive you crazy. [46:39] But when you catch it, there's a thing called being in stroke and being in dead stroke. It's a rare thing. It happens like, you know, once a month or something like that where you just can't miss. Well, you know where everything is. [46:56] And it's this, like, calm that comes over. Like, the world dissolves. And all you... [47:03] feel is the table and you're completely in sync with the movement of the balls you know how many revolutions each ball is going to make you feel the difference between two extra revolutions like you know where how hard to hit it exactly and that's what everybody's chasing they're chasing this feeling of being why does it happen once a month because it's so hard to get there you'd probably get i'd probably get there all the time if i played like a pro like eight hours a day you [47:33] Nobody stays there. But that's probably the draw that keeps you coming back. Yeah. Dudes do drugs just so they can get there. They get hooked on pills because they find that maybe it's amphetamines, maybe it's opiates, whatever it is. Some guys will do drugs and find that spot and then go back to drugs just to get to that spot. [47:53] From pool? From pool, yeah. Dang. Oh, it's a nutty game. I mean, I've never ever dug into it like that. Oh, at the highest levels, guys are gambling from hundreds of thousands of dollars in these fucking weird places in Kentucky and weird pool. They're streaming online on YouTube.

[48:12] They stream it on different websites. Dang. Oh, it's at the highest level. It is a crazy game. It's a crazy game. Well, I never knew that, but I learned a lot about that. I know a dude who's one of the best in the world and he can't travel because he needs pills. [48:26] So he can't go overseas. He can't go anywhere. He can't travel without his pills. If he does, he won't play right. [48:33] Really? Oh, it's nuts. Yeah. It's a head game. Oh, it's it. It's this is my friend Jeremy Jones. He won the US Open one of the greatest players of all time. He's like, it is the most and he plays everything. He played baseball, like at a high level, plays golf. He's like, it is the most mental game. [48:50] And it's why nobody's good at it. And it's why it never gets to it never got to a place where it was like really. [48:56] appreciated professionally. Right. Because you have to know how to play it to be [49:01] to understand what you're seeing, to really see people play well, you have to know what's happening. [49:06] I don't, I'd never, I'm not like good at any, I've not played sports, so I'm not good at them. No sports at all? I didn't really, I mean, I grew up kind of playing softball here and there. So is golf like the first thing you really? Golf is my first, and my amount of shooting, which is technically... [49:20] Labeled a sport. That's a sport for sure. [49:23] So that's like it's new to me. Sports are new because I just I don't know. I started this at 17 and didn't. [49:31] and just was laser focused like horse with blinders doing country music and then what is it like going from just being a regular high school kid and all of a sudden 17

[49:42] just being thrust into a spotlight well i wasn't in the spotlight at first i was playing shitholes with no lights but even shitholes there's some kind of light um you're on stage yeah the full damn light i don't know like i just i don't know i i feel like that [50:02] I didn't have a choice. It picked me. It's the only thing I've ever been good at. Everything is hard. Everything else is hard to me. But music was the only thing that I was like, I guess that's what I'm supposed to do because I'm actually good at it. Thank God you followed it, though. So many people have a thing like that, and they say, oh, that's just unrealistic. I can't do that. [50:23] I didn't have a backup plan. That helped. I barely graduated high school. I was like, I don't want to waste my dad's money. That does help. Going to college. I was like, I have no backup plan. So, like, it really does help. The hunger that it creates is like... [50:38] A fire that you can't explain. And it's not good advice. I would never give the advice of don't have a backup plan because some people are not going to make it. And then they'll blame you. You told me I shouldn't have a backup plan. Yeah. But I really think that. [50:53] For someone who's got some talent and a real desire to do that and you can stay the course, you can deal with the hard times, you can't have a backup plan. You cannot because that backup plan will rob your time. That's the thing you have to think of. It robs your focus. It steals from your energy. So it will stop you from reaching your full potential.

[51:16] Fuck your backup plan. I mean, it didn't come from me. Yeah, it came from me. Fuck your backup plan. I don't want to get blamed, but I just think that's like... [51:26] the reason that [51:27] it happened is a lot of [51:29] hard work obviously and determination but... [51:32] Just nothing else. I have nothing else. Like, I was terrible at school, terrible at sports, and... [51:39] I had to get tutoring, had to stay late for the cheerleading dance. Everything was just hard for me. Right, but that's just because you're a great singer. [51:47] Like that's where your mind works. [51:50] Like, [51:50] And it's just such a wonderful thing that you found the thing that you're really good at. Because some people don't. They just don't know why. They suck at school. They don't know why they can't pay attention. They don't know why they can't be at work on time. They don't know why. They're like, what's wrong with me? And if... [52:06] Maybe that person just found that thing and they're like, oh, my God, I'm supposed to be riding horses and shooting balloons. Exactly. Here I am. I found me. Yeah, I think it's – I feel – [52:19] Like, we're the lucky ones when we get to, like, we know. Like, this is... [52:23] This is what I'm supposed to do. This is what I'm going to chase no matter what it costs. And, you know, that doesn't I see so many people. [52:32] that are so immensely talented that just didn't happen for. Yeah. And you don't know why. Like the why you said, you don't know if it was one little factor of a period in their life or just not seen at the right time. [52:45] time or chasing the right thing at the right time. I don't know, I feel...

[52:49] I feel very thankful for that, but I'm also like, [52:53] trying to learn [52:55] new things at 40 because I spent my whole adult life doing that. You know what I mean? So now I'm like, what can we do next? Let's find another hobby. But that's a great approach, though. Yeah. That's great. I mean, it's recognizing you want to have some more stuff in your life that's interesting. [53:10] I think that does come, I don't know, does that come with like... Wisdom, with age? Age, wisdom, and also feeling accomplished. I mean, I feel like I set my goals, hit them. [53:20] Yeah. You know, and that feels like, oh. This episode is brought to you by Traeger Grills. If you enjoy food, and I mean really good food, Traeger is a game changer. This isn't just a grill. It's the ultimate way to cook outdoors, delivering unbeatable wood-fired flavor thanks to the all-natural hardwood pellets that fuel everything you grill, smoke, or bake. That's it. Just wood and fire and flavor. And what's truly wild is how easy it is. [53:50] Just set the temp, load the grill, and let Traeger handle the rest. Grilled steak, smoked ribs, even baked pizza, all on one grill. If you're into fire, flavor, and doing things right, check out Traeger Grills. [54:04] This episode is brought to you by SimpliSafe. One thing you probably don't think about when you're planning the perfect summer getaway is protecting your home. But if disaster strikes, you want to be prepared. Even better, if it can be stopped before it happens. So check out SimpliSafe. They're the smarter option when it comes to home security because their systems help prevent and stop crime in real time before it starts. There's also no long-term contracts and no technician appointments.

[54:34] custom system and set it up in one afternoon by yourself or even sooner. It's one of many reasons why millions of people continue to trust and use SimpliSafe. Everyone deserves to have peace of mind, which is why I'm happy to partner with SimpliSafe again and offer an exclusive discount. Right now you can get 50% off your new system by visiting simplisafe.com slash Rogan. That's half off at simplisafe.com slash Rogan. There's no safe like SimpliSafe. [55:04] Okay, I can take a breath. Yeah, that's got to be a part of it, right? [55:07] That's got to be a part of it. There's got to be a part that, you know, you can relax a little. Like, not that... [55:13] you know, you will, you know, when it comes to like writing and singing and stuff. But at least you don't have to worry, like, am I going to make it like, I kind of made it. Yeah. And what's the point in the whole idea of making it is like, [55:29] Your life will be better. And you'll have... Well, your life will be better if you have more fun. Yeah. Like, find some stuff you like to do. Exactly. You seem like somebody that chases a lot of new things and conquers them, which I think is really inspiring. Well, I chase things that you can never conquer. That's the key. Well, that's... [55:44] And no one told me that until I started playing golf, and now it's too late. Yeah, well. You can't ever win. For me, it started with martial arts. You never conquered that. [55:53] There's always going to be somebody better than you, especially if you're not a professional. But you get really, really good at the things that you're... [55:59] Yeah. Pursuing. Well, it's probably mental illness. So you spend time on them. I think there's something wrong with me. For sure, if I was born at a different time, I was born in the 60s. They didn't really diagnose kids with ADHD when I was a kid. Oh, we both have it. And dope them up. A hundred percent. We a hundred percent have it. A hundred percent. I got it. Whatever that fuck it is, it's a superpower. It's a superpower if you use it right. Yeah. I think so too. Yeah. Just the idea that you have to medicate a kid because you can't sit in school.

[56:26] Find out if that kid's good at other stuff. Right. Find out if there's a thing that... 100%. Yeah. Okay. Maybe they can't sit there where someone's teaching them math. Maybe they get bored real quick. Maybe they start talking to her friends. Whatever it is... [56:37] They probably have a thing they're really good at. If they could find that thing, I bet they're focused like a motherfucker when they're playing video games, right? Yeah. So what's that all about? Yeah. [56:46] You know, [56:46] Find the thing that that kid can lock into. 100%. Yeah. [56:51] The thing is, like, you make people do things that are completely unnatural. You make people sit down when they're six in a chair while some lady who's making $35,000 a year doesn't like kids is teaching them some shit that she doesn't care about. So there's no energy in the room. Everything. And then when they're out in the yard with their friends, they're having fun and they're laughing. So they're talking, this is bullshit. This class sucks. And they're talking to each other. And then they get in trouble for talking. Like, oh. [57:21] Your child's a problem. Is the child really the problem? Seems like the child has a lot of energy. That's not a problem. Yeah. You're not providing an inspiring environment for a growing mind. Just turning you into a dull drone, some worker that just is capable of shutting themselves off all day and then showing up and then just doing some stuff that they don't want to do because they were taught how to do it when they were a kid. Like, bleh. [57:47] I feel like there's a lot more opportunities now than there was, like, even when I was in school. It was kind of just like... [57:54] Lindale ISD, like everybody learns the same, everybody goes to the same class, you know what I mean? And I just, my mom says I learned differently. She tries to say it not differently. You learn differently? Differently. But looking back, it's the same, like you just described my entire existence as a student. Well, it's not just yours, it's mine, and I think it's most people's. You know, the only class that I really enjoyed was, well, science. I always enjoyed science, and I enjoyed art.

[58:22] I always enjoyed that. But even my I had a shitty art teacher in high school was like like a failed artist. It was like really negative. [58:30] And he kind of [58:31] he's kind of ruined the vibe yeah like not really but ruined the idea of me doing it as a profession i was like god i have to be around people like this like this guy's gross he was just like so negative right [58:44] Bitter. Just sad. Just a sad old dude. I always remember he like he like he ate a basketball like his whole body was skinny. But his belly. Now I know that guy probably drank himself to sleep every night. Well, he was you sad as an artist trapped in his own life. Like they could. I mean, also wasn't that good of an artist. That's part of the problem. Part of the problem was he needed a backup plan. Well, I just don't think he was he had a lot of fire. [59:12] in him when it came to anything. And I think [59:16] The art that he created was a representation of who he is as a human. And he saw these young kids that were talented. I was pretty talented. I was like the third best kid. There was a kid named Kevin that was like a little better than me. And then a kid named John who was the best guy in our class. And John told me like a year or two ago we were emailing each other back and forth. And John told me that that guy gave him an F. [59:38] And I was like, okay. [59:39] So it wasn't just me. That guy's a piece of shit because John was the best artist like I'd ever seen when I was a teenager. And we were all like, fuck, this guy's like the art world. We're out. So none of us became artists. [59:51] That's sad. Oh, it was just this. That was what this guy wanted. Yeah. What this guy wanted was to kill dreams. I feel like it's so especially in that. Like, how old were you? When I quit the classes, I stopped my senior year. But by then I was also traveling and fighting. By then I was there was like when I heavily got into martial arts. So by the time I was 17, like my whole senior year, I was traveling around the country.

[1:00:17] It's crazy. That's why I started making money. [1:00:21] Playing music at 17. Your senior year of high school? Yeah. Wow. So that must have alienated you from a lot of your friends. Yeah. And I mean, I was also... [1:00:29] very big into church choir and stuff. So I'm at the honky-tonk until four in the morning because I was the house band. And then I'm dragging a leg into church, smelling terrible. No wonder y'all kicked me out of youth groups, you assholes. That's hilarious. I probably deserved it. That's hilarious. What did you do last night? My mom had to go with me for the first three months of my house gig because I couldn't get in until I was 18 and I was playing in the house band. So she'd be like, oh, good, you can drive. [1:00:59] drink beer and listen to y'all play. Oh, that's hilarious. That's funny. But it's funny what you're talking about teachers. I feel like [1:01:06] There's some that just really, there's that turning point where you meet that one teacher or someone in your childhood or high school years that... [1:01:15] turns things around for you. I got like, when you're talking about your art teacher, I have this teacher named Miss Caldwell, and she taught speech, and I was a terrified person. [1:01:26] literal the shyest kid ever my parents are both very vibrant and huge personalities and like i couldn't get a word in edgewise so i just didn't talk till i was like 16 because they just wouldn't shut up they're just constantly dad's telling little cop stories about his vash days and my mom's a pi so she's telling all her cool stories and so i just was really shy and my little brother the same he's five years younger and like we just weren't very like vocal and i somehow got

[1:01:53] I didn't pay attention and didn't put down my classes, you know, like my junior year of high school. And I got shoved in a class where there was one spot, and it was speech honors, and it was a debate class. [1:02:04] And like, that is not my vibe. I was panicking. My mom came up to the school. I was sobbing. I was like, I can't do this. I don't even speak hardly. And, but I was singing like here and there. I was singing in church. Like I could do it if I was singing. [1:02:19] but like still shyly singing, you know what I mean? Like kind of in the background. And, [1:02:25] My mom was like, we got to figure this out. The school was like, [1:02:29] Well, there's not really any room for her, any other classes and whatever. And it was an honors class. Like, this girl is, like, barely passing every class except choir. They just allowed you to enter into that class? They just somehow. And so then I think, looking back, like... [1:02:43] Ms. Caldwell and the principal met with my mom and, um, [1:02:48] she's looked at Ms. Caldwell and she was like, can she do this? And she was like, she needs to do this. And so, and I had to debate, um, [1:02:56] like against these seniors and real smart kids. Right. And, but it really brought me out of my shell. And so I'm thankful she wasn't like your art teacher. I'm thankful that Ms. Caldwell was like, no, I see potential in this girl. And if she's going to, cause I sang at the talent show or whatever. She's like, she's going to be a singer. She's going to have to learn to be in front of people and to like show her personality and come out of her shell. And it really like changed my world because then I started playing in bars and I started to like,

[1:03:24] come into my personality a little bit because you can't do this if you don't have... [1:03:29] If you. [1:03:30] Aren't confident and have confidence in who you are, you know, right and the ability to be who you are in between songs [1:03:37] That is a really important part. Yeah. And that's where people get to see you. Yeah. So I'm thankful for her. Thanks, Miss Caldwell. Love you. Damn, Miss Caldwell killed it. [1:03:47] She killed it. Yeah, that's that's beautiful to have a teacher like that. And anyone can speak that the anxiety about like, oh, I could never public speak like, yes, you could. You just it's not impossible. Can you talk to me? OK, then you can talk to a bunch of people. You can do it. You might have to do it a bunch of times before you figure it out. It's not like breathing underwater. You could totally do it. It's so scary to me. I mean, honestly, like you're so good at it. Also, comedians like that to me is the scariest thing. [1:04:17] of all the showbiz that you could pick is that. Yeah. It's one of them. It's incredibly. That's kind of what I like about it, though. I like scary stuff because you'll have less people doing it. So you'll be like, I'm big fish. That's why I got into fighting. That's why I got into comedy. [1:04:34] It's like... [1:04:36] Let's say if you want to be a lawyer. You know how many people are trying to be a lawyer? Right. Oh, my God. You got to go to law school. You got to get a degree. You got to pass the bar. You got to get hired by some sort of a law firm, and you got to try cases. What are you doing? A lot of people are trying to be lawyers because there's a clear pathway. But if the pathway is foggy, how do you be a professional fighter? Oh, I'll go that pathway. No one's doing that. The people that are doing that are all crazy.

[1:05:06] are my kind of people or if the pathway is how to be a comedian like oh yeah all these people are all misfits this is perfect these are my people like this is perfect i'll go do that like this is like i'm in short of being around like-minded interesting people yeah [1:05:20] That's a great way to look at it. But I just think, I always think about how, like the first time you step on the stage and you're... [1:05:27] you know. [1:05:28] you're showing all your cards. Do you remember your first time? Well, but for a comedian, to me, it's like, songs are different. Yeah. You know, the first game you play, whatever, everybody has their first time that they're like... [1:05:41] learning their their ropes and how to get their feet under them but but that's just so raw like here's my jokes here's my [1:05:49] wholeheart. Yeah. Here's... [1:05:51] I hope you think this is funny. Every time I see it, I'm like, that is the hardest thing in Joe business. The first time I ever did it, I was still fighting. And I'd done nothing but martial arts competition, like literally eight hours a day for my whole life for six years. And then I was more scared going on stage at an open mic night than I'd ever been fighting. [1:06:12] Ever. That makes sense to me. But I was confused. I was like, why am I scared? Like, this doesn't even make sense. It was so baffling to me. I was like, why am I so nervous? That makes sense to me. It's something you... [1:06:24] Well, you knew you were good at it, but you had to do it in front of people. I didn't even think I was good at it. My friends told me I was good at it. And they only told me I was good at it was like we would go to tournaments and everybody would be terrified. We'd all be like really nervous. And I would be the humor. It was gallows humor. So I would be the guy cracking jokes. I would be the guy doing impressions of each other, like of different friends, like what they'd be like having sex or whatever it was. And making everybody laugh, saying totally inappropriate stuff. Yeah.

[1:06:54] who I'm still friends with to these days. He was a grown man and I was like 15 at the time. And to this day, he's still one of my best friends. But he told me, he's like, you should be a comedian. Like, you're funny. It's like, and I was like, you think I'm funny because you like me. I go, but other people can think I'm an asshole. Like, my sense of humor is fucked up. And he's like, you should just go to open mic night. And I did. And I went to open mic night and I was like, oh, everybody sucks. Oh, this is fine. I was like, you go to see a few [1:07:24] struggling. I thought everybody would be like Jerry Seinfeld or Richard Pryor. I'm going to get killed up there. This is going to be terrible. And then I realized like, oh, this is just like martial arts or anything else. You start off terrible. [1:07:35] And then you try, and then you get better, and then you figure it out, and then, you know, it's like... [1:07:41] But I just wasn't. [1:07:43] I was just stunned by how scared I was. [1:07:45] More than anything. Yeah. [1:07:47] Do you remember the first time you ever got on stage, like at a honky-tonk? Yeah, it was a... [1:07:52] How old were you? 16. It was a True Value Country Showdown, the Rio Palm Island, Longview, Texas. Wow. [1:08:01] Yeah, and I was scared to death. Because I was like the shot kid, too. But my dad's a songwriter, too. [1:08:06] You're going to love this. He's a cop and a songwriter? My dad is a songwriter. He plays guitar. [1:08:11] And he had a band... [1:08:13] His cop band on their side gig was all narcs, and they were called Contraband. They were a country band called Contraband. Can you even? That's a great name. It's the best. That's a great name. That's funny. Yeah, but he wrote songs, so I was like, I'm going to enter this contest. My mom was, like, shocked. I was, like, working in the yard. She's like, go pick the weeds. I'm like, Mom, there's a...

[1:08:34] out on the radio for a contest called the True Value Country Showdown, and I want to enter it. And she was like... [1:08:39] What? You don't even talk? You don't... [1:08:41] You're too shy. Like, are you kidding me? And I was like, no, I want to do it. And she was like, what are you going to sing? You had to sing an original song. And I sang one of my dad's. [1:08:48] Oh, wow. What was the song? It was called, gosh, now I can't think of it. [1:08:55] Too many song titles in my head. Way too many. That's like Dunbar's number. Here I go again. That's what the title is. Oh, okay. And... [1:09:02] So like, because I grew up on like, forever I thought my dad wrote like, Mama tried. Because I grew up with him just playing John Pryde and Haggard and David Allen Coe and Guy Clark, you know, so... [1:09:14] I started to realize, oh, some of these are like my dad's. [1:09:17] originals and some of those are real haggard so they're not just dads. But like... [1:09:23] I got up there and I got... I didn't win, but I... [1:09:26] It was like my first, okay, like you were just saying, it was my first like, okay, maybe I can do this. Like I'm green and I'm shy and I'm new and I'm young, but like I... [1:09:37] I'm not terrible. Like, I'm kind of equal with these guys. You know what I mean? We're all babies. Yeah, it was. Exciting. And it was... [1:09:46] I don't know. I think that's the first time I was like... [1:09:51] Okay, I found something that doesn't feel foreign to me. That's not so hard to learn. You know what I mean? Yeah. Do you believe in fate? Yeah. [1:09:59] Yeah. [1:10:00] I do. [1:10:01] You probably should. Yeah. Right? Because it worked out. Yeah, exactly. That's my bias about fate. Like if anybody should believe in fate, it's people like you or I. But I'm not sure –

[1:10:14] My bias is that I believe in it because it worked out. Yeah. But I mean, if your life is shit and you're like, is this fate? Like, what did I do in a past life? Like, what kind of an asshole was I? [1:10:26] And everything just turned out so terrible. You know? Well, I mean, I don't know. I feel like I also met my husband in like a crazy way. And so I can't help but believe in fate. There's something to it. Yeah, I believe in it. Yeah, there's something to it. [1:10:44] My rational mind wants to ignore the possibility, like the randomness of the universe, the size and scope of it all. Do you really think it matters what you do? But it does to you, right? It has a giant impact on your life and everything matters. Just because there's black holes doesn't mean your fucking – your homework doesn't matter. You know, everything matters. Right. Your whole world – everything matters. [1:11:14] your life. It seems to have a plan for everything. Yeah. [1:11:19] I mean, all of it seems to be happening for some sort of a very bizarre reason. All of it together. [1:11:25] So I'm sure that [1:11:27] There's something to fate. But it's just my rational mind wants to go, that's just your ego. It's like silly. You could have been bored in Somalia. You know, life could have sucked for you. You know, it's hard to... [1:11:40] Because fate's a weird one. Like, you can't measure it. You can't put it on a scale.

[1:11:45] But it seems to be real. [1:11:47] Yeah, it was real for us. [1:11:49] So that it's real. [1:11:50] I guess. Also, I'm like, your ceiling is giving me... Yeah. I love it. The little shooting stars. Yeah. And you were like, fate is real. And it was like, boom. And I was like, yeah, it is. [1:12:01] If I don't tell people, I didn't tell you. But sometimes people... [1:12:05] I love it. They're like, am I having a flashback? Like, what's going on? It's awesome. That's what I love about West Texas. Something about, like, it's just so vast in the middle of nowhere. Like, the stars are... They feel like... [1:12:16] We call it the Thunderdome when we lay in the yard and it just feels like you could reach up and grab them because it's so dark out there. Yeah. It's magical. Well, they're on top of you and you don't have any light pollution. Yeah. Yeah. That's the thing that ruins the world. [1:12:31] Yeah. That's the problem with New York City. That's why everybody's so stupid. They're like so like stuck in their own world just because like they don't realize they're in space. Exactly. You know? Yeah. You don't get that break. Yeah. No breaks. There's a break that you get from space that I don't think you get from anything else where you just like look up and go, oh, yeah. Okay. [1:12:51] I'm taking all this shit way too seriously. Yeah. This is nuts. Like just above us. It totally is. And also when you said that, it made me think of – [1:13:00] what we were talking about earlier about wisdom and like, [1:13:05] I don't know, just kind of reaching some goals and taking a breath and calming down and going, okay, everything's okay. It's like, I just feel... [1:13:13] like [1:13:14] I saw she started and lost my train of thought. I have ADHD.

[1:13:20] Maybe I have to shut them off. Well, we were talking about space and inspiration and fate. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Summer means fun and making memories, but it can also feel like you're in survivor mode with packed schedules, keeping the kids entertained, and chaotic routines. That's not so fun. [1:13:44] You've got to make sure that you're taking care of you, and therapy can help with that. From setting boundaries to making a space to recharge, it can help make your summer more balanced and enjoyable. With BetterHelp, you can connect with a licensed therapist online. You'll be matched based on your needs and can switch any time if it's not the right fit. With millions of clients worldwide, people are finding the support they need with BetterHelp. [1:14:14] this summer. Find guidance in therapy. Visit betterhelp.com to get started. That's better h-e-l-p.com. This episode is brought to you by Dodge. The new Dodge Charger scat pack is built for people who still believe driving should be exciting. You want to talk about performance? [1:14:44] a 60 in just 3.9 seconds and a top speed of 177 miles an hour. Unlike vehicles that make you choose between traction and attitude, the Dodge Charger Scat Pack comes with standard all-wheel drive and a selectable rear-wheel drive mode so you can get confident handling when you want it and the freedom to still be able to do burnouts. Available in both two-door and four-door models,

[1:15:14] charger scat pack. It's loud. It's fast. It's powerful and unapologetically Dodge. Learn more at Dodge.com. Dodge is a registered trademark of FCA US LLC. [1:15:31] What are you sending over there? What are those? Oh, these are Lucy's. They're breakers. You do you ever take these? I like Zins. You like to hear. Try these. These. These are strong, [1:15:44] Oh, like what? Sixes? Nine. Oh, I'll pass out. Yeah, don't do it. I'm not doing it. I'm not doing it. This is strong. [1:15:53] This one's not, yeah, these are nines. [1:15:56] Oh, you got some fours? Yeah. Oh, check me out fours, huh? [1:16:00] Thank you. [1:16:00] What's the Lucy's? [1:16:02] Um, why are they different? Um, they have like a little thing inside of them that you, they're called breakers. So it's like coffee flavored you put in your mouth. Just like it then? Uh huh. Yeah. [1:16:14] And you crack that little sucker open. It gives you a little blast of flavor. A little sugar. That looks like a little piece of cupcake. A little piece of candy in there for you. Those are fours, right? So that's not bad. That's a nice... [1:16:27] If I get up and run out of here. I'm already sitting to concentrate because of the shooting. I saw a dude online. He got a 50 milligram one from overseas. What? Yeah. [1:16:38] And he tried it, and he was... [1:16:41] violently ill, lying on the ground. Like, I made a terrible mistake. Why would you do that? Well, I think he did it for props, you know, like, so he could get some online cred, like,

[1:16:51] just for the views. Did it for the grand? Did it work? [1:16:54] I mean, I guess I watched it. I wanted to say I'm like, you're gonna take a 50. Oh, you're fucked, dude. And he said, Oh, my God, it's like drinking battery acid. And then he was lying on the ground. The end of it is like, I really fucked up. I made a giant mistake. [1:17:05] Because it's so much nicotine. 50 milligrams is crazy. But you're so, like, so... [1:17:10] into health and just take such good care of yourself and i what is the bit what like why i just tell people oh they're good for you have one well what do you think like tell me your opinion of these there's crazy nicotine is not bad for you right the delivery method is what's bad for you and um the delivery method with cigarettes in particular with cigarettes that have a bunch of chemicals added to them that's even worse like the regular cigarettes like natural cigarettes i [1:17:40] Dr. Suzanne Humphries, she's a physician who was on here, was explaining to us, like, why regular cigarettes are not as bad. But it's still not good for you to be smoking in your lungs. But... [1:17:51] Nicotine itself is not bad. Nicotine itself is neuroprotectant. Nicotine itself actually is a nootropic, which means it's cognitively enhancing. So nootropics are like vitamins that help brain function, and there's a bunch of them like… [1:18:09] We have some stuff called AlphaBrain that's great. I've seen that. There's a bunch of companies that make different versions of nootropic. But there are nutrients that enhance memory and enhance your verbal memory, so your ability to recall words. They can enhance peak alpha flow state. They've done two double-blind placebo-controlled studies at the Boston Center for Memory with AlphaBrain.

[1:18:39] over the past nine months before they did this. This is pretty impressive. [1:18:43] So [1:18:45] Nicotine does that too. Nicotine enhances your memory, enhances brain function, enhances, it stimulates you. [1:18:51] So there's a lot of benefits to nicotine as a – but the problem is like how do you take it? How are you taking your nicotine? Probably one of the best ways, maybe gum. [1:19:02] You know, and these things... People are wearing patches now and stuff. Oh, fucking crazy people. That's Ron White. He wears a goddamn patch. What are you doing, Ron? Well... [1:19:11] I got a patch on and I'm smoking. [1:19:14] He's got a cigar. He's got a Zen fucking animal, but he's such an animal. But I think, uh, [1:19:25] There's real benefit. I know a guy who puts a nicotine patch on for productivity when he writes. [1:19:30] That makes sense to me. Like, I feel like... [1:19:33] Because all the songwriters are... [1:19:35] you know, right now it's everybody in Nashville sitting and, [1:19:39] I'm like, I'll try one. And it really does give you a little... Stimulant. Yeah, and I also have a lot of words in my head. I need to remember words, and I also need to write new words. So anything to help with that. Anything you want. If you want help with memory, Alpha Brain is a really good one. I want to try that. That's a good one. I just think like... [1:19:59] Um... [1:20:00] At some point, too, when you're tired, you know, it just feels like you can't. I mean, you saw me lose my train of thought. It's like I don't want to be on a bunch of Adderall and stuff. I want to find a different method to have my brain functioning the best it can. These are addictive, though. And I got to say, different people have different levels of how addicted they get with these. Some people cannot have them. I went on vacation. I said, I'm going to go on vacation and not bring any and see what happens, see if I freak out, just to see.

[1:20:30] nothing zero nothing it was like i kind of missed him maybe [1:20:34] For a day or two, like wanted one, didn't have any. And then after like three days, I was like, oh, this is fine. [1:20:40] It's not like a physical, like, oh, my God, I'm jonesing. It's not like smoking. I'm shaking. Yeah. Yeah. But I know people that have tried to get off of them that really struggle. [1:20:51] I mean, it is addictive. I mean, it's nicotine. I think the vapes are the hardest to get off of. The vapes? Like, that's... [1:20:56] I don't want heat on my voice either. Right. Well, vapes aren't really hot, but it is. If you buy them ones that are like in the gas station, like who knows where those are being made. But the ones that heat up. Oh, yeah. The crazy ones. I like that. [1:21:11] Adam Curry, do you know who Adam Curry is? He's the first podcaster. He used to be MTV VJ. Yes. Yes. Yes. Good. Good friend of mine. He carries around one of those robot lunchbox vapes, those big old crazy ones where you're blowing. It's like kind of like a power bar on the side of it. It's so ridiculous. And he blows this giant, but it's all like he, he fills it with natural oil. So it's. [1:21:37] air quotes healthy air quotes yeah yeah but that's what they that's what people say they smoke american spirits yeah it's healthy come on there's an idiot on there yes exactly how come they get away with that are american spirits owned by native americans [1:21:54] No? So how the fuck do they have a Native American on there and not catch any slack? They do, right? Don't they have an...

[1:22:00] It's a bad-ass package. They've gotten in trouble in the past for stuff. Did they? I'm not getting into it. Oh. I'm not getting into tobacco company problems. [1:22:09] He's like, uh, and pivot. [1:22:12] Did you ever see that movie, The Insider? [1:22:14] With Russell Crowe? I don't think so. It's about a guy who works for a tobacco company that is explaining. He was a chemist and he was explaining how they added all these different things to make it more addictive. And they're trying to kill him in the film because they don't want that information getting out. He's the insider. It's a kind of crazy movie and based on a true story. Wow. Yeah. They put a bunch of shit in cigarettes to try to get you hooked. Well, then they do it. I mean, it works. People. It does. That's the hardest one. [1:22:44] It's the most you hear people talking about trying to quit that and drinking to me. Like, you know what I mean? Just on the daily, like I'm in a band. So everybody's like, oh, I quit. Now they're all like, you got a Zen? You got a Zen? [1:22:54] Because it's just highly addictive, I guess. [1:22:56] It is, but people want something. They just want something to take them out of whatever state they're in. Give me something. Give me a drink. Give me this. Give me a coffee. Everybody I know that's in Alcoholics Anonymous, they all smoke or drink tons of coffee. It's either or both. Yes. Because they just want to do something. Something's not going to make me suck dick for bus fare, but I'm going to at least get a little bit of something different than regular life. I don't want to be homeless. I don't want to be cracked out. [1:23:26] something. Just give me a little something to take me away from wherever I am right now. Not that far away, just a little bit away. Just a little next door. Let me go next door and hide.

[1:23:38] I'm going to start saying that when I'm like, can I have a zen? I need to go next door. Yeah, I'm going to go next door. Just a little bit. I don't want to go too far away. I can hear everybody. Am I supposed to break this little candy thing? I do. I break it right away. It just cracked down on that little sucker. What's in there? Probably candy. Nice, right? That's like a little burst of [1:23:56] A little birth of flavor. I went next door. I like those. I like those. That's funny. My buddy Duncan found out that his blood sugar goes up when he vapes because he was buying those gas station vapes. And, you know, he got type 2 diabetes because he was eating too much sugar. [1:24:14] He's okay. Don't worry. But he... [1:24:17] uh, realized cause he monitors his blood glucose that like when he was vaping, his blood was going through the roof. I go, okay, why do you think that is? Like, why do you think it's strawberry flavored? What the fuck do you think's in there, bro? You're eating candy all day. Like you're vaping on sugar. [1:24:32] sugar [1:24:33] Yeah. Oils? Yeah. [1:24:35] Yeah. It has to be. Yeah. It has to be. I mean, if it's like grape flavored or whatever the hell it is, it's like there's some. Also, who knows what kind of oil they're putting in those damn things. It stinks. It's probably made in China or somewhere. [1:24:50] I watched a video on TikTok of these dudes testing them. So if some dude is just sucking on each one of them to make sure they work at the factory. What's going to happen to him? I don't know what's going to happen to you because you're sucking on the same one that he was sucking on. Nobody cleans those things off. You just get them at the gas station and stick it right in your mouth. That's like a karaoke mic. Yes.

[1:25:10] That's nasty. So nasty. Okay, I'm spinning this out. Pause, pause. [1:25:13] Oh, you're getting rid of it? Ooh. [1:25:16] It gave me a... It was like a... Buzz. Yeah, like a little buzz. Yeah, a little next... You went next door. Yeah, I like that. Yeah. Excuse me, I'm going next door. Yeah. Yeah. [1:25:24] So anyway, nicotine vapes. I don't think they're good for you. [1:25:28] Folks. [1:25:29] Sorry, because people thought they were healthier for you than cigarettes. But it turns out, like, no. [1:25:35] Not only that, yeah, here's this dude. Oh, God. Look, he's testing all of them. [1:25:38] All those cute little pink ones, you've got to make sure they all work. By the way, how hooked is that guy? [1:25:43] That guy must be fucking hooked. Where is this taking place? I have no idea. [1:25:47] Does it say in the [1:25:50] That guy has to test all of them. [1:25:52] I would like to see what that guy's... That guy looks like he's 15 years old. [1:25:58] No. [1:25:59] Seven to eight thousand tests per day. That's terrible. [1:26:03] Bro, test his lungs. Because there's a thing called popcorn lung that kids are getting. Yeah, I've heard of that. The thing about these things is that they're very, very addictive. They're more addictive than I think any other delivery method. [1:26:17] Like you just – and – [1:26:19] The thing about nicotine vapes is the first vape of the day is the only one you really want. [1:26:24] The first vape of the day, I would take a vape and be like, this is wonderful. Like this feeling is wonderful. It's wonderful. And then you chase that dragon and you never get it back until the next day. The rest of the day, you're sucking on this thing and go. [1:26:39] nope, nothing.

[1:26:40] I'm not getting it. I'm not getting that wonderful feeling. Yeah. You have to have no nicotine in your system. And then you have that one hit. It's like, welcome me into your life. Do you get like, do these people get like that feeling from those patches? [1:26:54] I don't think so. [1:26:55] I think the patches just make you... Oh, like a little Adderall-y? Yeah, it's like... I'm sure people have Adderall patches, don't they? Do they have an Adderall patch? No. [1:27:04] No? Adderall's a sketchy one. [1:27:07] I had someone here the other day was telling me they were doing Adderall right before. I did an Adderall just so I'm ready. [1:27:13] It's like it's a writing. It's very helpful for writing. Oh, I'm sure. It's like you don't want to have, I don't want to need it. [1:27:20] So that's why I was like, what brain thing's going to take? Yeah. What are Lucy's? What does it say, Jamie? Oh, amphetamine patch. There it is. Oh, sure are. ADHD treatment that lets you control your time, your way. They always say that. Like, look, there's a woman who's in control. Look at her with her jean jacket on, her arms crossed. I'm in control. She's got a controlled posture. Look at her posture. [1:27:42] I'm on a meth patch. I'm in control. [1:27:47] A meth patch. Please, Lord, no. [1:27:50] literally on a drug that will kill your superpower. [1:27:54] You've got a superpower and you're killing it with a drug. So you could focus on... I definitely don't want a patch of that. Yeah. No thanks. No thanks. I don't need it. Hard pass. Maybe somebody needs it. I don't want to judge. But the reality is that stuff, the... [1:28:07] Amphetamines in any shape or form are highly addictive. Yeah. And they're passing them out like candy. Yeah.

[1:28:14] My daughter is in high school, and a bunch of kids in high school have, air quotes, ADHD. And because of ADHD, they get Adderall. And then also they get more time on tests. [1:28:26] Because they've got ADHD. They can't focus. So they're fucking on speed. Strix of the train. Yeah. [1:28:40] whatever they're probably already hooked on too because a lot of people that are adults are hooked on it yeah and you can tell those folks because they come to the the parent teacher meetings and they can't shut the fuck up and they just want to talk to you about everything oh my god they want to corner me and ask me about some episode i did oh my god i love that episode that you did with the guy about climate your eyes they're so cracked out they're so obviously cracked out and there's a lot of people out there just running around cracked out because but they feel like they got it from the doctor the doctor gave me i'll tell you that 30 milligrams and i'm just a [1:29:10] I like to talk to that person daily. I feel like those people are everywhere. They're everywhere. Yeah. Well, we looked it up. Use Perplexity, which is one of our sponsors, and find out. [1:29:23] How many prescriptions for Adderall they wrote in, let's say, 2024? [1:29:29] Let's take a guess. [1:29:31] How many do you think? I mean, I could not even ballpark that. [1:29:34] I want to say 40 million. I bet it's 40 million prescriptions, at least. It's probably a lot more. But I'm going conservative, and I'm saying 40 million prescriptions for Adderall in 2024.

[1:29:49] What do you want? You want to guess? Yeah. Take a guess. 40, I don't know if you're saying 51. 51. You're probably closer. I bet it's like 90. I bet it's nuts. I hope it's not. I bet it is because it's like individual people refilling prescriptions. You know, I don't think it's like 90 million patients. [1:30:04] But it's a lot. [1:30:06] I bet it's all journalists. I bet like most people that are writing things. Yes. Yeah. I bet that in – what is it? Okay. How many Adderall prescriptions were written in 2024? According to Plexi, 45 million Adderall prescriptions written in the United States. Well, we were both in the middle. Yeah. What did you go, 51? Yeah. I said 40. [1:30:26] Commonly prescribed stimulants for conditions such as ADHD and narcolepsy, this number follows several years of notable growth. [1:30:34] Huh, weird, or more people need it. [1:30:36] It's up since 2019. Look at that. Yeah, notable growth. Data suggests the prescription rates began to decline slightly after a sharp surge during the COVID-19 pandemic. [1:30:47] And shortages affected. I'll stop. 2019, it was only 35. Interesting. [1:30:54] So it's up $10 million. [1:30:55] Whoo! [1:30:57] That's crazy. [1:30:58] 41.4 million in 2021 and 45 million by 2023. [1:31:04] I bet there's a lot of people getting it illegally too. Like what's that number? [1:31:08] Okay, let's... That's because there was that shortage. Right. They've recovered from it. Mm-hmm. Well, also, once the shortage started, people got dealers. Sure. But people are using mushrooms and stuff for that now, too. That's a very different thing. I've heard a lot about that. Yeah, microdosing mushrooms, that's a very different thing than Adderall.

[1:31:27] Yeah, that's like the opposite of Adderall. [1:31:29] Yeah, even if it's for focus, right? Well, I'm sure it'll help you focus. [1:31:34] On something. Yeah, but you've got to mind your P's and Q's when it comes to your dosages. Also, where are you getting it from? That's just scary for me. I'm like, where is it from? Did you just go to the cow pasture? Because that's what teenagers do. I heard they were doing mushrooms. They're like cow tipping and going. I'm from East Texas now. Well, they definitely found them growing on poop. I mean, that's how all humans originally probably discovered psilocybin. [1:32:00] They found him on cow poop. Yeah. [1:32:03] But the thing about that, though, is like you've got to get them from somebody who knows what they're doing. Yeah. Because they're all different. And you can get some that are crazy strong. Like there's some out there that will knock you into another universe. So what do you do? Are you just eating a cap? Are you paying attention to the – are you getting them in pill form? Who are you getting them from? Like I have a friend who – They're all my questions too. Gets them from a friend. And I was like, who's the guy? Who's the guy? [1:32:33] these things get packaged? Get the fuck out of here. A little shady. Super sketch. Super sketch. It's like marijuana edibles before the legality in California. [1:32:45] When it was medical, it was crazy because now they – because of the regulations in California, I think the most they could make them is 10 milligrams, which is – [1:32:55] Normal. It's a normal dose. But before that, when it was medical, like it became medical in the 90s, they would make 500 milligram Chiba chews. These things that like – they're 500 milligrams, which is insane. It puts you in another dimension. I never even heard of that. They're so strong. And my friend Joey, who's a real demon, Joey used to take the wrapper off of 25 milligram ones and give people a 500 milligram one instead.

[1:33:25] Oh, he's a real demon. And he would just laugh because he can tolerate insane doses. So he would give people like preposterous amounts. [1:33:36] I have a songwriter friend, and I love her dearly, but whatever she says, do this. I'm like, do a quarter of that. Whatever that is to the public, do yourself a service. Do a quarter of that. Some people have ridiculous tolerances. For marijuana. Yeah, I mean, it's crazy. Yeah. For anything. I'm just over here. [1:33:55] just a [1:33:56] taking a Lucy from a random dude. It was only four milligrams. It's minor. It wasn't that bad, right? I would never, like the nine, I would have told you. That's like a lot. It's a lot. [1:34:07] I have 12s. [1:34:09] What do you use those for? Real busy days? I don't like them. They jolt me too much, but I have them just because Lucy sent them to me. [1:34:16] But I think the right dose is three or four. That's right. It's just a little pick-me-up, just a little. Not the cracked out. Talk about. Yeah, not the cracked out. Not Adderall. I've never tried Adderall. [1:34:27] I'm scared of it. [1:34:29] I want to try it one day because I'm scared of it. Because I'm like, I need to know what everybody's fussing about. [1:34:34] Because everybody I know that's tried it is like, don't try it. [1:34:36] You'll love it. You'll love it. You'll fucking love it. It is focus. I mean, it is. It really hones in. I have a buddy of mine, and his wife told him to stop because he was snorting it because he was writing. That's insane. He's like, that's the best way to get it real quick. And he was like to his wife, he's like, why do you care how I do it? She's like, you're snorting drugs while the kids are asleep. He's like, okay. Yeah, it's a little far, dude. Slow your roll. He's not an addict, though. He just felt like. He's not an addict, though. He's not an addict. He felt like he had to snort.

[1:35:06] to really get the most out of it quickly. Well, everybody, like you said, everybody's trying to find something. Because I think if you take it as a pill, it probably takes like an hour before it kicks in, and he didn't have an hour. [1:35:15] So he's like, I have a deadline. Yeah. Does your friend that disappears, does he like to have, he doesn't have phone, no digital, no nothing. I wonder if that digital detox is like one of the hardest ones. I feel like it's gotta be the hardest. Yeah. I've done a social media detoxes for multiple days and you genuinely feel better. [1:35:36] And then you go, why am I doing this to myself? Or I don't do this. I know. All the time. Something that's annoying, if I can just say it, is that like when people do... [1:35:46] Take a break from social media. That's like all they tell you about the whole time. Well, I'm on a break from social media. I'm like, can you be on a break without telling anybody that you're on a break from social media? Right. They have to tell you how virtuous they are. I am actually going to break social media. Unlike you. I'm like, cool, bro. You, you little addict. Scrolling through cat videos. Doom scrolling. Yeah. There's a lot of doom scrolling. [1:36:09] Yeah, it's like people who do yoga. They can't shut the fuck up about it. Yeah, or people with like a special diet. Oh, yeah. Carnivore people. You're hearing about it. Vegans are the worst. You're going to hear about it. They're the absolute worst. Like no one has ever met a vegan that didn't tell them they're vegan. It doesn't happen. [1:36:28] They always tell you. Never. Not when they're working into a conversation. Eventually. This episode is brought to you by Uber Eats. This summer, soccer is here, and the watch parties will be going back to back to back. But don't worry. Uber Eats has your game day essentials covered with 30% off all orders from Aldi, Kroger, and Dollar General. All the snacks and groceries to keep your crowd happy delivered straight to your door,

[1:36:58] Game day spread. Order in so you can stay locked in on the game. All the hosting, none of the hassle. Order now for 30% off your game day snacks and grocery order only on Uber Eats for a limited time. Offer eligible for 30% off entire order. Taxes, fees, and terms apply. Offer valid through July 5th. Product availability varies by region. Exclusions may apply. [1:37:26] When you're a small business owner, you're always looking for the next big thing. Whether you're a gym owner looking to expand, a store stocking up for a busy season, or a restaurant owner planning a new menu, [1:37:37] you'll always need capital to grow. [1:37:39] But traditional banks are making it harder than ever to secure a small business loan. [1:37:44] That's why thousands of business owners trust Cardiff for same-day funding. [1:37:48] Their online application takes less than five minutes and won't impact your personal credit score. [1:37:54] With over two decades of expertise, it's no surprise business owners keep voting Cardiff, America's favorite small business lender. [1:38:02] If you've been operating for at least a year and are earning at least $20,000 a month in revenue, [1:38:06] Apply now for up to $500,000 in same-day business funding at cardiff.co.rogan. [1:38:13] Again, that's cardiff.co slash rogan. Cardiff. Borrow better. [1:38:18] They'll let you know how virtuous they are. It's like just, you can not eat meat and not tell anyone. Yeah, just shh. Do it as a spiritual growth, like just like an exercise. It's your little secret with yourself. Yeah, your little secret with yourself is you're not on social media. So don't, tell me. My favorite is people who are on social media making fun of people that are on social media. Because there's a lot of like...

[1:38:43] really not self-aware people. They're like mocking people that spend all their time on social media while they're making videos on social media like [1:38:51] That's rich. [1:38:53] it overwhelms me honestly i'm trying to you can't keep up with it so i just try i don't try to keep up with it like i was just talking on the way here i was like maybe i need to get on tiktok it's like there's a lot of music on tiktok like there's a lot of musicians and like yeah we have a label now called big loud texas um our office is in austin and i'm like i know there's amazing talent on there and one of our flagship artists dylan gossip [1:39:18] posted something awesome on there and now he's out there crushing it. So I feel like I'm missing out. But then I'm like... [1:39:24] Do I need one more thing? [1:39:27] I don't know. It's like this. Do you have an assistant? Battle. Yeah, and I have a great management team. This is great. Get your assistant on TikTok and then tell them to let you know if anything's cool and show it to you. She did that and we signed a guy. His name's Al Flayford. You got it. That's what happened. So perfect. That way you don't have to be on it. Right. [1:39:43] So you could avoid it and she'll be a net that catches all the good fish. Cameron, it's all you, girl. Yeah, it's all you, girl. So she'll catch the good fish. You don't have to go by the river. Just stay off that tick-tock river. I needed that talk today because we just had that talk on the plane on the way here today. Because it's a raging river. I'm scared. Yeah, you should be scared. I'm like, I'm already like... [1:40:04] Oh, everything's just a lot of information all the time. I know. For me, it's like a show of force when I leave my phone on the nightstand when I go to the bathroom. [1:40:13] It's like, I'm going to take a shit without my phone. Do you tell everybody? Nope.

[1:40:17] See, good. Just told you. See, good. Just told you. See, you're not one of those. You're not like, I'm on a social media break. No. My wife has, like, an app on her phone that shows, like, how long she's been without social media. Like, if you want to go on social media, you have to go into the app, enter a password, and open everything up. I think that's so smart. Oh, yeah. And she showed me the other day. It was like 90 hours. I was like, that must feel so good. She's like, you feel different. You feel different. It's not good for you. Bad for everybody. No, but we need it. But we, for some things, I get it. [1:40:47] It's great for artists. It's great to promote your work. It's great for comedians to put clips up. It's great for musicians to put songs out there. It's great. It is great in a lot of ways. I'm so happy it exists. Oh, me too. I was stapling my posters to a phone pole when I started. I did it old school. Boots on the ground, walking up to the radio station, knocking on the door saying, can I play a song? Really? Yes. Have you ever seen Loretta Lynn's life story? Have you ever seen Cole Miner's Daughter? [1:41:17] Yes. That. Like me and my mom with a bologna sandwich in my mom's Ford Expedition, like driving around all over Texas, me going, I'm a singer-songwriter. And now I'm like, dang, I'm jealous of the way that people can do it now. Yeah, but I think you probably developed so much character doing it the way you did it. Yeah. I'm thankful for that. But I'm also like, well, damn. These kids, they just post something and like 100 million people see it in a night. Like what's happening?

[1:41:47] get fame they're not really ready for yet. [1:41:49] And I think doing what you did and going to bars and then eventually becoming famous after years and years of performing and promoting yourself and getting your chops on stage and really settling into yourself. That is so much better than being like a 20 year old kid, like sits around and comes up with a song. Like, look at Oliver Anthony. All right. Oliver Anthony is a good friend of mine. He was selling fucking farm equipment. [1:42:19] Makes that rich man of north of Richmond song. And all of a sudden he's a giant superstar. And he's like, dude, I had a phone call with him while it was going down. Was he just like, help? Like, I mean, that's crazy. Yeah, he's like, people are offering me money. I go, don't take any money from anybody. Do not sign with anybody. I go, you don't need anybody. You already did it, right? You've got talent and you're already famous, right? You just made a giant hit song. Don't give away any of you. Yes. Don't sell it. [1:42:49] You know, he's like, well, they're telling me I got to strike while they are. And so I'm like, fuck those people. They don't know what they're talking about. You could do this again. You can do this again and again and again. And now that you already did it, it's going to be way easier the second time because everybody's going to be waiting to see what you say next. Yeah. [1:43:02] I know. And that's like... [1:43:04] Also, nobody, you can't learn... [1:43:07] It's like you... [1:43:08] You do the journey in reverse. Well, he did the first show he ever did was a giant sold out. The first time he ever performed live. Giant sold out show when he was already famous.

[1:43:21] It's so mind boggling. I can't even like put it in the words because I'm thinking like how you get your chops and how you you did it fight by fight. You did it stage by stage when doing comedy like it just happened so fast. And it's like. [1:43:37] And then you still have to pay the dues, but it's just backwards. The thing is, though, he paid the dues as a regular blue-collar human being. Yeah, he did, for sure. And that's where he developed his character. Yeah. So that when it all came, he's like, oh, my God, I just stepped into a magic story. Right. Like, he had a regular story. Right. And then all of a sudden, a genie came along, and abracadabra, the Internet. And the Internet just put that song out there, and everyone's like, holy shit, this song's great. And all of a sudden, he's hugely famous. [1:44:07] But he had character for someone that being a real person. Seventeen. You know what I mean? Impossible. Yeah. Yeah. It scares me. I'm just like, we still got to go do the work now. Yeah. We still got to start developing who you are now, even though the world already knows who they think you are. You know? It's almost impossible if you start too young. Like, we were talking about that with Michael Jackson the other day, that, like, no one can teach you how to do that, and no one survives that. [1:44:37] No one gets through. It comes with a really high cost. You can see it. Yeah. I always make the analogy that's like you're making cement, but you don't put the right ingredients in, and you can't go back and remix it. Right. Right. [1:44:50] Like if you don't put enough water in or you don't put enough sand in, that cement sucks. It's always going to be fucked up. And that's what it's like when you're a kid and you get famous. Like you didn't allow that person to mix correctly. Right.

[1:45:02] I think that, like, that's why I'm glad I... [1:45:05] you know [1:45:06] I didn't go to college, but I got to have the learning times of just being 17, 18, 19, 20. [1:45:13] learning life like while playing music, but it was just kind of in some... [1:45:20] dive bar somewhere it wasn't in front of people you know what i mean and i you get to build your character you get to figure out who you are and that's why i think the down by the river and the tick tock river i learned two things i'm going to refer to it as down by the river and i need to go next door the tick tock river yeah it's a raging river too that's a scary ass river that river never stops i know [1:45:44] It never stops. Which we're thankful for it, too, by the way. Like, I found some great talent and learned some really cool recipes and get to talk about rescue dogs, you know? Yeah. There's the good things about it. There's great things. It's basically a new element of human civilization that we have to contend with, that we've never figured out how to – there's no real, like, precedent on how to navigate this, especially as a child. No children ever grew up with it before. These are the first children that are growing up with it. Yeah. [1:46:14] Right. We can just observe what's going wrong with it. [1:46:17] Yeah. That's real sketchy. Yeah. Yeah. [1:46:19] It's real weird. [1:46:21] And people say to me, like, do you let your kids on social media? I'm like, yes, because they have to be able to handle it and they have to know what it is. But don't but also don't do it. My my one of my daughters, my youngest also has that same app on her phone. She never goes on social media anymore.

[1:46:35] How old is she? She's 15. So she stays off of it, and she'll watch YouTube. She'll watch YouTube videos and stuff like that. But, like, social media, she's like, it just doesn't – I don't like it. It's not good for you. And it gets in the way of school work, and it gets in the way of stuff she's doing. So she stays off it. But she's just wise. If I was 15, I'd be fucked. I would have been fucked. I was so dumb. Oh, no. I don't believe that for a second. I would have been TikToking all day. I would have been making all kinds of stupid videos, trying to get attention. [1:47:04] That's also part of the problem is that kids are doing things just to try to get attention rather than doing things because they really love an art form they're trying to get better at. Like if you make a great song and you're 17 years old and it goes viral, at least you're doing a thing. Like you're doing an art thing. Yeah, 100%. You're not just trying to get attention. [1:47:26] A lot of people out there that don't have a thing, they're just trying to get attention. If you ask young kids, like, what do you want to do when you grow older, when you grow up, a lot of them, a giant percentage of them just want to be famous. I was about to say that. Like, I saw that, whatever that study was, and I read about it, and it was like, but famous for what? [1:47:47] Like you just want to be famous, but what skill or what? [1:47:52] trade or what like what are you just famous [1:47:55] Why? Kim Kardashian. Why in the world? Like that sounds awful. Well, because they see cameras going off and people are staring at you and that's a person, that's an important person. You know, a lot of people just want to be an important person. They want to be a person with the nice stuff. Like look at the nice house and look at the nice cars and look at the nice watch and the nice this and that. They just want to be an important person. And the society that they are growing up in shows them that all you have to do is be famous.

[1:48:25] Kardashian is one of the most famous people alive. She doesn't do anything. It's not a thing. Like, where you can point to, oh, she's like the best Kardashian. [1:48:33] Mmh. [1:48:34] She's the best painter. She's the best singer. Nope, nothing. Zero. Zero things. Super famous, worth a billion dollars. And then kids are like, that's what I want her through, especially if they're dumb. And unfortunately, a lot of people are dumb. And those people never thought they would ever be famous before. But now you can be dumb and famous. [1:48:53] I mean, that's a statement. Yeah, dumb. You can be dumb and famous and not be good at anything. Like maybe you can be dumb, but you're like the greatest baseball player of all time. That's great. And you're famous. But no, you're dumb and you're famous and you don't do anything. You're not good at a thing. [1:49:08] There's no fulfillment in that, right? I know, right. There can't be. There's not. [1:49:14] Even if you're not great at the thing or a thing or if you try a bunch of stuff and you kind of suck at all of it, but you are working on it or whatever. There's fulfillment in that. There's – Yeah. There's like – [1:49:26] An accomplishment. Like, I paint folk chickens, and I'm terrible at it. You what? A little, just folk art chickens. I don't even know why. You paint folk chickens? I have no idea why, and they're not good at all. You make paintings of chickens? I just paint them on little canvases. What's a folk chicken? Well, I just call it folk art because it's bad. And when I look up folk art, I'm like, oh, I can do that. Like, some folk art's amazing, but I look up, like, folk art for beginners, and I get inspired. I'm like, oh, I can do that. I've never heard that genre before. Look it up. It's anything and everything.

[1:49:56] Folk art? What is the definition of folk art? That kind of stuff. [1:49:59] Oh, okay. Reflect the cultural life of a community associated with fields of folklore and cultural heritage. Huh. It's a 19th century concept. I don't know anything about it. [1:50:13] I just am drawn to it because I think it's cute and fun. Do you have any of your stuff online? No. [1:50:18] It's like in my backpack. I'm not going to show anybody. This is. It's like a panel for my mom. She has to hang it up. That's interesting. No, mom. She put it in her kitchen. [1:50:29] I didn't know that that was it. Show me some more of those images. I didn't know that that was a genre. I had no idea that that was a thing. [1:50:36] I'm terrible at it, and I don't know anything about it. I would like to learn. I want to take some, like, I'll look up YouTube classes or whatever. So it's like, keep it on there. So it's like not realistic. Folkart chicken. Okay, there's a Folkart chicken. Let's see. Look, they're so cute. [1:50:50] Look how cute they are. Okay. Like that one, like that little chunky one in the middle, the black and white one. How about the whimsical red hen above your cursor? Yeah, see? I'm only as good as like, go back. [1:51:00] That one. Yeah, that's about... See that one that says whimsical red hand right there above your cursor? Oh, she's cute. Above your cursor, Jay. Yeah. Yeah, click on that one. See, I could like... [1:51:09] to the website. [1:51:10] Oh, but that one. And I'll go to like YouTube's of teaching me. All that to say... [1:51:15] I'm trying something. [1:51:16] I think it's great you're doing different things Boy some of these chickens are terrible [1:51:23] How about that one? Hey, it's art. You cannot speak ill of that. If I saw a chicken like that, I was like, that chicken, that's a drone. That's what I look like, for real. That's a drone. They're so bad. Put in my yard by China. My husband is probably dying out there that I even brought this up. He's like, are you talking about your stupid folk art chickens? So I'm just being there, he's like cooking, and I'm just like, I'm painting my chickens right now. Always chickens? I don't know why. I have no idea. It's easy. It's fate. It's fate. You're designed to be the greatest folk art chickens. That's my next song, folk art fate.

[1:51:53] I'm full Garp Fate. [1:51:55] Imagine if that's what it is. It's like there's something compelling you to tell the world about chicken folk art. I guess so. Here we go. Do you have chickens? Yeah, I do have chickens. I have chickens. I love chickens. Chickens are great, right? They're awesome. They're really cute. [1:52:08] The ladies. I go in the yard like, hi, ladies. That's why I call them. I say, hey, ladies. I give them all the scraps. They love everything from the table, like any leftovers. It's funny to watch them, though, because they're, like, picky. Like, the other day, I thought they would eat, like, leftover breakfast casserole. Wouldn't touch it. Really? But they were all, they didn't eat the biscuits. Chickens don't like biscuits. Well, maybe they know that breakfast casserole is eggs. I'm like, Jesus Christ, this lady is fucking nuts. She's trying to turn us into cannibals. [1:52:38] I didn't think about that. Maybe it's like, Oh no, what have I done to my ladies? It might be like a natural reaction to them. I'll tell you what they go crazy for is mice. Have you ever seen? Oh yeah. Yeah. So this is how I found out. Um, [1:52:55] I used to have a house in California that my wife, she changed our back fence. It was a wrought iron fence, and she changed it to glass. And when she did, she signed a death warrant for a bunch of hawks, and they kept slamming into that fucking glass. And like three of them died in our yard, and one of them got KO'd but survived. And I was on the road, and she had told me about it, and they'd taken this hawk, and they had put it in a box.

[1:53:26] And when I got back, we got them what's called pinkies. And what pinkies are are these little baby mice that they feed them to lizards and snakes. Like that's what they're for. Like when you go to the pet store, they sell you these things. They're not weaned from their mother and you feed them to snakes. I know it's dark. So they bought a bunch of them and fed this hawk these little baby mice and it ate all of them except one. And my daughters were very young at the time. [1:53:56] to keep that mouse. We're going to raise it. I'm like, honey, you can't. [1:53:59] It's not going to live. Like it's not weaned from its mother. It won't survive. I go... [1:54:04] I'm just going to go see if the chickens will eat it. [1:54:07] Thank you. [1:54:08] I put this thing down and these chickens attacked like they were raptors from Jurassic Park. One chicken grabbed it and they all chased her around. They were stealing it from her. What in the world are you saying? Pulling it out of her mouth. [1:54:22] It is that they are so ferocious. Like, you've never seen anything like a chicken with a mouse. I've never heard this in my life. I'm going to show you a video. And this video, there's a bunch of videos of cats with mice. [1:54:34] So this is a mouse. And look at these chickens. Oh, my God. They just... [1:54:39] kill this mouse. And look, they all attack each other, trying to steal the mouse away from the one chicken.

[1:54:47] Hmm. So there's another mouse in there that they don't know about yet. So see, there's one with a cat. So the cat is playing with the mouse. Like, you know, cats don't kill it. They want to play. And this chicken just runs over and snatches it from the cat. I have never heard this in my life. So look, the cat has a mouse and chicken's like, give me that bitch. [1:55:05] Look, it's got a mouse. [1:55:07] And the cat's like, Jesus Christ, you guys are psychos. [1:55:11] Well, who knew? Yeah, well, because they're dinosaurs. [1:55:14] That's where they are. [1:55:16] They're just dinosaurs that are really small that survived the impact of the asteroid. I also love dinosaurs, so maybe that's why chickens, I'm called to paint my full chickens. You just don't realize how ruthless they are. I've never heard this in my life. This is blowing up. I'm country as a pumpkin, and I've never heard this. [1:55:31] They destroy mice. Dang. Destroy them. They love them. They tear them apart. Well, I'm not going to go do that, but I'm glad I know that now. Like nothing I've ever seen before. We also saw a mouse that got loose in the chicken coop once. We had a big chicken coop and a mouse went in there and I saw these chickens just tear that mouse up. My breakfast casserole is not offensive to them. They're eating their own babies. They're not. We don't have a rooster. They're not. [1:55:56] Well, I know, but they don't know that. You know they brood. I know. I just let them sometimes. Do you? Well, sometimes they look at me like, let me sit on this. Like, okay, you can have it. That's your egg now. Yeah, but they pluck their feathers out. I know. That's a lot. They get real. It makes you sad. It's like they want to be a mommy. They do. Yeah. You don't let them. We had a rooster once, but he did not last. I do not enjoy having roosters. They're ruthless little fuckers. Yeah, he attacked my wife, and she's like, we're done. Mine attacked me. I'm out on a rooster.

[1:56:26] Thank you. [1:56:27] Yeah, they're assholes. But they're doing it because they're trying to protect their hens. They don't know that you're okay. They just think this big fucking thing is moving around their hens. This giant person thing. They're also mean to the hens. Real mean. Brutal. Ripping their feathers out. I'm like, I can't do it. Yeah, they're nasty. [1:56:46] How many do y'all have chickens? We have 15, 15 or 16. Do y'all name them? Yes. I don't name them, but my daughter and my wife names them. But the rooster, he... [1:56:59] We only let him – he got to maturity and then we gave him to a friend. [1:57:04] We're like, this motherfucker can't. I was going to kill him. They're mean. Yeah, he attacked me. I went into the, I was like, you just got to show him who's boss. And he's like, no. [1:57:13] No, I'll attack you too, bitch. Yeah, exactly. He attacked me, and I was like, bitch, I will fucking kill you. And so to avoid killing him, I gave him away. [1:57:21] Because I was totally ready to kill him. Yeah. Because when I'd go in there, he'd face off against me and just leap at me and claw at me. [1:57:27] Mom attacked me too and dad... [1:57:29] Dealt with it. I don't know what happened to him, but Dad dealt with it. Soup. Turn him in a soup. Yeah. That's the thing about roosters, too. I guess you can't just outright eat them. They're really tough. [1:57:39] So if you do kill them, you've got to like... [1:57:42] either slow cook them. [1:57:43] Or turn them into soup. [1:57:45] Well, we probably did. You didn't tell me. I had a landscaper back when I lived in L.A. who used to fight chickens. [1:57:53] And he took me over his place once. I hate that. It was crazy. I hate it. And he had like 100 roosters. We have done some. Boxers. My nation has done. We're not just. We don't just help dogs. We help all animals. But dogs are focused. But like we've helped break up some chicken rings. It's kind of crazy that it's still around. It's awful. There's some. It's always out. Like we have a farm in Tennessee and there's.

[1:58:15] a whole... [1:58:17] This is whole farm. [1:58:18] like down the road, and it's... [1:58:20] They keep them in tiny cages. I just hate it. And every time we report them, they just pay the fine. [1:58:25] You know what I mean? Well, it's a part of the culture. That's the problem. And they all gamble on it. I know. He was Mexican and, you know, from Mexico. And he had all these friends that lived in this neighborhood where he lived in. Like, you might as well have been in Mexico. It was crazy. Everything was in Spanish. And when I went over his place, it's like his buddy... [1:58:44] We went over his buddy's place. His buddy had like 100 cages in the backyard in a pit where they would take the roosters. Yeah. And they put spurs on them. It's so terrible. I mean. Knives on their claws. [1:58:56] We try to, like... We got to be part of some of the... [1:59:00] But when you confiscate, like, that many... [1:59:03] mean, I mean, you can't. [1:59:06] Yeah. And reintroduce them into the world. Right. You know what I mean? They're taught to be mean. Right. [1:59:11] The bread for that. [1:59:12] Yeah, and they'll breed champion roosters from champion other roosters. Let's just stick to our little backyard hens. How about that? Yeah, it's a weird thing because their culture has been they fight them, and then they take the loser and they cook them. [1:59:29] Yeah. And, you know, he was making it seem like it was no big deal. And it was like to them was their gambling recreation. Yeah. It all happened. [1:59:35] gather around and guys would come from long distances to bring their chickens to fight. I hate it. [1:59:41] Yeah. [1:59:42] To me... [1:59:43] it doesn't freak me out as much as dog fighting. Dog fighting drives me nuts.

[1:59:47] His pit bulls are the, look, they're very dangerous because they have a very high prey drive and they often don't, [1:59:55] They confuse children with other animals. They don't... [2:00:00] as pets they are the most loyal they're the sweetest kind they love you to death they love you so much but [2:00:10] There's so many bad ones and so many ones that are raised just to fight. And that part of our culture, that part of society, like the underground dog fighting part is like – [2:00:21] How can you do that to a dog? Like, how can you do that to the best animals? It's scum of the earth is what it is. Um... [2:00:29] I feel like I have some friends that are huge into pit bull rescue and when they're either rehabilitated or just, they get a bad rap period, right? Like, [2:00:38] Like, say, any metro shelter you go to, it's 90% pit bulls because people are afraid. Yeah. But they get such a bad reputation, but there are some amazing... [2:00:50] pitties that weren't ever in the fighting rings they were just overbred and you know taken out of a confiscation of a um of a hoarding situation or breaking up the fighting rings and it's the mama dog that's just been having puppies and like i just wish people would at least open their minds and hearts to like there are some amazing pitties out there or pity mixes you know there are but they're also very dangerous i get it i know they are on other dogs they will fight those dogs to

[2:01:20] adoption you know but the problem is oftentimes you don't know their behavior until they're around other dogs yeah like i've had dogs that were great around people and i'd get them around any dog and their hackles would go up and they immediately wanted to fight yeah and you're like oh god and then you're the asshole because your dog is like pulling on the leash and you're like i'm sorry let me get them out of here right i know they're dangerous they're dangerous in that regard because they really are bred to fight [2:01:44] And I think it takes a special... [2:01:46] household and owner, too, to really kind of handle a dog like that. 100%. Our best friend's Gwen. She's in my band, and her and her husband are longtime Pitbull rescue family, and they just know how to, like, deal with them, and they come around our dogs. They're fine. Everything's fine. But it's definitely an alpha male, like, whore. [2:02:06] They kind of show him his boss right away, and they sort of... [2:02:10] understand the food chain of the house you know what i mean yeah there's dogs that are great dogs but they just need a lot of attention like if you have a german shepherd or a belgian malinois you got to give those things something yeah you got to know what kind of breed you're getting like i feel like people i always preach adopt don't shop but i still think you within the adoption like really need to go i'm gonna spend some time with this dog i'm gonna talk to its foster family i'm gonna foster it just to really understand what kind of breed you're getting if [2:02:40] a lazy... [2:02:42] cuddly thing, but still protect her kid of Pyrenees. You know what I mean? Right. Just know what you're getting. Like, just understand, like... [2:02:49] Is my household ready? Because there's a lot of the, what breaks my heart the most is the, like, owner surrenders and the returns at the shelters. You know what I mean? It's like you didn't think through what you were. Right.

[2:03:00] And then the dog already thought it had a home, and now you're bringing him in. Right, because you wanted a lazy dog, and you got a cow dog, and it needs to run. Great Pyrenees are great because they're kind of a combination of like a lab and a protecting dog. They're a great little balance. Yeah. Like I have a friend who has a Pyrenees, and it's like such a good dog. And he's like, listen, man, if coyotes come around here, this fucking dog fucks them up. Yep. I go, really? And he goes like, oh, yeah. Like you ain't never seen a change of personality. [2:03:30] He's a coyote. But then they're like laid up on the couch with their legs in the air. Oh, the sweetest. Just rub my belly. He's the best. Like I have a golden who's, he's the best, unless you're a squirrel. And then he's hell. [2:03:43] Then he's a demon. He's a squirrel killer. But other than that, he's the sweetest boy. He's just so nice to everybody. Everybody who comes over to the house like, you're my best friend. Golden to the best. They're so sweet. But I love them all. I love them all. We have a chihuahua. I mean, you're getting a chihuahua. You know what you're getting. [2:04:00] mean as hell and nervous so mean she's 16 and blind and she still tries to bite she don't know where you are but she's like [2:04:10] but I could get you. 16 is old. And blind as a bat. Oh, my God. Senior dog house over here. Have you had her since she was a baby? Yep. Wow. I adopted her from a shelter when she was like eight weeks old. We got two seniors now. I was a crazy dog lady when my husband met me, and I had eight rescues. It seems crazy now, but it's...

[2:04:32] I have farm and land and three were Pyrenees. [2:04:36] two golden mixes and then [2:04:38] three little, I don't know what's, and I've lost one every year for six years. And so after this, we have two seniors left and my husband's like, my heart can't take this. Like he never had dogs growing up. He loves dogs, but he was like, [2:04:49] this is awful. Like ever since we met, we've lost one cause they're stair step in age. And so I'm like, I need a, my heart needs a break. It's hard. Yeah. It's hard when they die. It's like, it's, it's so hard. [2:05:03] You're so close to them and they only lived to be 15 or 13 and then it's over. They're like put here to show us true love. [2:05:10] I know. They really are. [2:05:11] Meanwhile, they're not. Meanwhile, what they are is we took wolves and turned them into bitches. That's what really, really would happen. Like I have a King Charles Spaniel. You know, he's the sweetest. That's Charlie. Is that Charlie? That's Charlie. He is the sweetest. He's so cute. You pick him up, he just kisses your face. He's just so adorable. That was a wolf. [2:05:33] At one time, someone took a wolf and turned that wolf into a bitch and, like, you're not – [2:05:40] Enough of a bitch. Let me turn you into more of a bitch. And more floppy ears. And now we have Bernadoodles. [2:05:48] It's so weird what humans have done to dogs. I know. And we've created all these totally helpless little tiny breeds. I know. It's weird. Shih Tzus and all these little tiny things. Pikinis. Yeah. These little weird little. But they're all amazing. And there's plenty at the shelter that y'all should go check out. Look, they're amazing. I love them. But it is a weird thing that we've done. I know.

[2:06:10] Because they all used to be wolves at one point in time. Yeah. [2:06:13] That's got to be the weirdest transformation of an animal by human interaction is wolf to dog. Yeah, I mean – [2:06:21] I just wonder, like, the first one to do it. Do we know? They think it was just, like, cavemen by the fire, and wolves would come around, and they had killed something. They'd throw them a bone. And the relationship became the wolves would let them know if intruders were coming. Right. And then eventually they softened to the point where they could, like, sleep with these people. So they were, like, household animals or at least stay around the house. And they trusted them to protect their children. [2:06:51] breeds that were better at like herding sheep yeah like because you gotta think like most wolves killed sheep yeah so all of a sudden you could teach a dog to like make sure the sheep don't get killed by wolves which is nuts it's nuts and it's incredible to watch yeah and watching dogs like bird dogs yeah it's one of my favorite and also like the canine units they blow my mind like the things these dogs can do and the stamina they have and you know i think the biggest freak dog [2:07:21] It is. When you see them run up walls and fly through the air. But that's one of the dogs you're like, you need to know what you're getting. Oh, yeah. You need a dude that can run with his dog. All day. And you can't leave him alone. And you can't like, hey, man, can you watch my dog? I'm going to be gone for a week. Like, nuh-uh. Uh-uh. That dog's fucking. Heart pass. That dog's coming with you, bitch. Exactly.

[2:07:43] You need to. That dog's watching you. Yeah. That dog needs activity. Yeah. Have you ever seen the video of the difference between the way a German Shepherd approaches [2:07:51] an assailant versus a Belgian Malinois? No. So they do these drills where they have a bunch of chairs in a room. Yeah. And the German shepherd runs around the chairs to try to get to the guy who's got the bite suit on. The Belgian Malinois goes over all the chairs, just like flies through the air, barely touching the chairs. Watch this. There it is. So here's the shepherd. See how the shepherd runs around the chair? [2:08:12] And he's like, I'm going to get you. I'm going to get you. And he finds you and he bites you. Watch the Belgian Malinois. As soon as they let him go, he's like, fuck these chairs right over them. That's incredible. They're just meat missiles. They're meat missiles. Yeah. Like they're designed to go fuck things up. That's their task all day long. And they're crazy smart. They're really smart. It's intimidating. Oh, yeah. They look at you like a raptor in Jurassic Park. They're like checking you out. Yeah. What are we doing? Am I killing you? Or are you just one of my dad's friends? That's a perfect, perfect analogy. [2:08:42] They're looking right at you like this. You're like, oh. And you're like, can I... [2:08:45] Pet it? Yeah. Or is he at work right now? He's working. Yeah. Yeah. I don't ever pet Malinois unless I know for sure. Yeah. They're just, it's a working dog. It's a different. [2:08:56] thing same you know i mean but it's also kind of crazy that they figured out a way to make a dog into that like how how do you make a dog into my dog which is like just a cuddle but he just he's just a cuddle bug he just wants to lie down with you like today we're watching tv he just cuddles up he's like got his head in my lap and i'm patting him we're watching tv he's like so happy the only one i think about in my house that used to be a wolf is my chihuahua because she's the

[2:09:26] But it's just so crazy that they figured out a way to make a wolf into a thing that protects animals from wolves. Yeah. I didn't think about it like that. [2:09:34] I mean, some of them. Have you ever seen that? What is that shepherd dog, that crazy giant one from Russia? [2:09:41] What is it called? Not from Russia. [2:09:45] It's like a mountain shepherd. [2:09:47] It looks like a werewolf. [2:09:49] And it's got really crazy thick hair because of the climate that it lives in. But it's like 200 pounds, like this enormous thing that protects. Caucasian Shepherd. That's it. Caucasian Shepherd. It literally looks like a werewolf. Like that werewolf that we have out front. [2:10:04] American Werewolf in London? That's scary. That's what it looks like. And they just protect, look at that. [2:10:08] Oh, I've seen those. I just didn't know what they were called. Crazy. See if you can find one that's doing bite work. But look, that one looks sweet. Yeah, unless you break into the house. [2:10:20] I mean, that thing's crazy. Google Caucasian Shepherd. [2:10:25] training. Yeah, or bite. Oh, God, that does look like the thing in the front. That's fake, but look at the side. That's one pretending to... There's one that's doing bite work, though, in that other image. [2:10:38] That's the word for them. It's like a word of Charka. [2:10:43] Like, that is a big-ass dog. [2:10:47] And that's another dog that they use to... [2:10:51] to protect against wolves. [2:10:53] Look at the size of that sucker. [2:10:55] I mean, it's... [2:10:56] huge

[2:10:57] So what are they doing here? Where are they? They're rushing? Yeah. [2:11:00] It looks like they're transporting it. Training YouTube channel. Oh, okay. They're training it. [2:11:06] Yeah. [2:11:08] with a big bag of shitty dog food. [2:11:10] colors. [2:11:11] That dog food that people buy. I know. That stuff's so terrible. You do farmer's dog. Uh-huh. Me too. Yeah. We started off with another company called Maeve, which is great. It's frozen. [2:11:22] But just the way he eats farmers dog, the way they eat it, it must taste way better. And it's the same kind of thing. Yeah. It's real food. It's frozen. Yeah. Get it frozen, thaw it out and feed it to him. Yep. When he's ready to eat, he devours it. Yeah. Devours it. I had to start that with my senior dogs because they just had all kinds of things, you know, and everybody had ailments and needed pills and everything else. And I was just like, all right, we're just going to do the expensive dog food. [2:11:50] I had three Pyrenees rescues, two golden mixes, and, like, three littler dogs. I'm like, this is, like, $700 a batch for all y'all to eat. So I started making it for a while, too. Like, I would just make, like, ground turkey and vegetables. Oh, that's great. But I just couldn't keep up with it. So, I mean, farmer's dogs is what we used to. Well, it's definitely way better than regular dog food because anything that can sit on a shelf can't be good for you. It just can't. It's filled with preservatives, and that's not good for dogs. It's like us living on Cheetos, I feel like. Exactly. [2:12:20] Sometimes I want to eat them sometimes. Yeah. I love them. Yeah. Like if you were stuck in a cabin for a week and you couldn't get out and there's an unlimited supply of Cheetos in the cabin, you're going to live. Right.

[2:12:33] But you're not going to feel real good. No, it's not. People are always like, what's on your rider? I'm like, Cheetos and Titos. It's kind of all I need. Is that it? That's your rider? Cheetos and Titos? Cheetos and Titos. That's hilarious. That's hilarious. Some people have wacky riders. What's on your rider? Not much. I have like a cheese tray maybe. Yeah, I have a meat tray. [2:12:52] A meat tray. [2:12:54] Uh, when I was drinking, it was, uh, we would definitely have like some whiskey on there and, uh, maybe like a bottle of wine. [2:13:05] but I really don't drink anymore. [2:13:06] Not that I, yeah, this is like, I wasn't an alcoholic, so it's not like I can't drink. Like I had a glass of wine with dinner the other night. [2:13:14] But it's not... [2:13:16] I don't drink anymore. Like I don't like we would, I would go to my comedy club with my friends or be going the road. I'd have a couple of glasses of this and a couple of glasses of that and a margarita at dinner. And then the next day I'd feel like shit. And it wasn't ever like I couldn't stop. It was just, I did. And then one day I was like, [2:13:34] I think I'm just going to stop for a while and see how I feel. And I felt so much better. So much better. Because I was drinking like two or three nights a week. Sometimes four. Go out on a date with my wife. I have a couple of drinks. I go to the comedy club. I have a couple of drinks. Maybe I have a drink or two with someone in the studio. Yeah. I mean, I feel like that's showbiz. I mean, just part of it. It's part of our culture. [2:14:00] We have to bring the party, too. That's the other thing. Yep. How am I supposed to bring the party if I'm not...

[2:14:06] partying with you. Right. You know? That's a problem. Yeah. Yeah, that's a problem. Especially in like the honky-tonk days. Like I came up and like... [2:14:14] beer joints. I'm talking about like [2:14:16] dive bars, you know what I mean? Just start... [2:14:18] getting in it with people and then and then you're on your day off you're like oh we're gonna have a nice date and have a drink you know what I mean it just it [2:14:25] It's kind of spirals. I know. But I love it. I love it, too. I love red wine. Like, it's my favorite. [2:14:30] Yeah. [2:14:32] I don't hate drinking. I just hate how I feel the next day. But, like... [2:14:37] I'm not, you know, I'd say I'll never do it again. But for now, I'm not doing it anymore. Right. [2:14:43] But I'll still have a drink or two. [2:14:44] Not even two. Not even two. I drink. I didn't even have a full glass of wine the other night. I had like a half a glass of wine. I'm like, we're good. We're good. [2:14:51] But, like, if somebody has a bottle of Buffalo Trace and we're sitting around talking shit, I want to have a couple of drinks. I might. You're just giving yourself permission to... [2:14:59] Be wherever you are. I'm just trying to be healthier is what it is. And I recognize that if I do all these healthy things for my body, I work out all the time, I eat so well, I take all these vitamins. Why am I letting myself get poisoned four nights a week? That seems stupid. [2:15:13] Especially with my lifestyle, it's like, it's better, like... [2:15:16] Even if I just limit it to one night a week is better. But really, it's better. Just not. Yeah. [2:15:22] The reality is it's not good for you. [2:15:24] Well, I know, but it's fun. It is fun. It is fun. Again, catching a buzz is fun. Some of my favorite podcasts we've ever done, like when we do Protect Our Parks, we get hammered. Yeah. They're fun. [2:15:34] Yeah. [2:15:35] I bet. [2:15:36] Yeah.

[2:15:36] I mean, people aren't doing it because they're stupid. Right. There's a reason why they enjoy being drunk. Yeah. And have for thousands. Thousands of years. Thousands of years. I mean, it's probably responsible for so many relationships starting in the first place. So many people meeting people. So many fun friendships. A lot of the memories, too. It's like on the road, after the show. It's like... [2:15:57] It's when everybody's just really being themselves. It's also a culturally acceptable drug that most people know how to consume. I mean, they might do it wrong or they might get too drunk or DUI or be an asshole. It's possible, but it's enough of a normal thing that... [2:16:14] A good percentage of people know when they've had enough. Right. And they know the right dose. [2:16:20] You know, you have a couple of drinks, like I'm good. Yeah. You know, you know where you're at. Whereas any other drug that you're trying today is illegal. Yeah. And there are any other drug. It's like, who knows what's going to happen. Right. [2:16:33] Yeah. [2:16:34] And if you want to go next door, [2:16:35] Like really next door, next door. I'm going down the street. Yeah. You can go down the street with whiskey. With a margarita. Whiskey, go to another town. It's martinis. Like everybody knows like. [2:16:46] Do not drink more than two martinis. Are you... [2:16:48] An insane person. Like, you can't. Everybody knows it? No one can do that. Everyone should know it. Like, I feel like that's what really. Do you know Burt Kreischer? Mm-mm. That motherfucker can put some martinis down. Really? Yeah. I'm like. [2:17:01] Two's good. Like, that's straight up. Well, you're smart. Just straight up. I mean, and then have your glass of wine, whatever you want. It has to. When you see, like, you know, somebody sit at a bar by themselves at, like, 3 o'clock, and then you're like, dang, that's their third martini.

[2:17:16] They're about to hit the deck and they're fine. I'm like, something's going to happen later. Something's going to happen later. They probably do it all the time. That's the thing. That's the, here's your sign. Yeah. [2:17:24] Yeah. [2:17:25] It's supposedly better for you, right? Isn't it? Like, do you drink Tito's, like a vodka martini is probably, is a gin martini the same? I don't know. I'm a Tito's and Topo's gal. Yeah. [2:17:35] Tito's a topo. [2:17:36] They say that clear liquor is better for you, right? Don't they say that? I don't know. We've made excuses for every single thing we want to do today. They say tequila is the best for you. This nicotine is great for us. It's clear. It's awesome. It's supposedly better for you, isn't it? Is there a reason why clear liquor is like a real reason why clear liquor? There's less additives in it. There you go. [2:17:59] That's how it is. [2:18:01] That's it? I'm pretty sure. Yeah, I mean, even tequila has got... You've got to find the good stuff. Right, but if you find the good... That's the other thing. I was reading this thing about how much tequila is fake. [2:18:10] How much tequila is not really made with agave? [2:18:13] That's a lot. A lot. [2:18:15] Yeah, it's a lot of fake. That'll hurt your ass. I mean, tequila will. Yeah. It's not forgiving if you abuse it. It's a certain kind of drunk, too. Don't ask me how I know. Tequila is like a shootout with the cops drunk. Yeah, that's like I shot my TV with my shotgun drunk. It's a high-speed chase drunk. Yeah. Tequila is just like, ooh, we're drunk on tequila. Yikes. Like, you know, you just picture yourself doing something definitely incorrect. [2:18:42] Yeah. [2:18:43] It's a funny thing that – I guess it makes sense, though, that music –

[2:18:48] And comedy in a lot of ways. [2:18:52] is connected to drinking because drinking like lowers inhibitions and it makes you want to sing along and it makes you want to dance and maybe you don't feel like you got the confidence to dance but you get a couple shots fuck it let's get on the dance floor it's like razor yeah it's just that's like the [2:19:10] It's like a feeling. And you're part of the party. And you're part of the song. And you're part of the show. Or whatever. I just think. [2:19:18] I think music and comedy are the most as far as show business. Like, you know, that people just feel like... [2:19:25] That's something that they go there to do. Right. [2:19:28] Well, there are two things that you have to go see live. [2:19:31] You don't have to. I mean, you can just listen to music in your phone and all that stuff. But the reality is it's way better if you're there live. Yeah. Yeah. [2:19:37] Like live, going to see live music to me is like so inspirational because I don't have any skill at live music at all. I don't have any musical talent. I can't play any instruments. So it's just, I don't ever think like, huh, I wonder why they did it that way. I see where they're going with that. You can just enjoy it. I could just be entertained. That's great. And it's... [2:19:57] I think music is a drug in and of itself because it... [2:20:01] does something to your a great song does something very powerful to you yeah like it'll make you feel powerful emotions or powerful inspiration it's like it does something that nothing else does [2:20:13] In a weird, weird way. And it feels so good. [2:20:17] Like when you have a song that somebody comes up and says, that song changed my life. That song, you know, I have one called House That Built Me that's like the one people come up to me the most. They're like, that's my story. And it's, I didn't write it. I'm like, but that's when I heard it. That's why I was like, this is my story too. And those are the...

[2:20:36] And like as a songwriter, when you write a song like that, [2:20:39] That's [2:20:40] That's the ultimate, like, reminder. Like, this is why I do that. Yeah. It made somebody feel something. It made somebody get through something. It made somebody... [2:20:49] I want to punch somebody, whatever the emotion is, as long as it brings out emotion, we've done our job. Right. Think how many people you've done that to. How nuts that is. Like you've had so many hit songs. You've had so many songs that resonated with people where they all felt that feeling when that song came on. Like, oh, this is my song. Yeah. This is my song. Turn it up. I have like the feisty, a lot of the feisty. [2:21:11] I mean, I'm-- [2:21:12] I'm a little calmer now, but it used to be quite the firecracker. Just pew, pew, pew, pew. I mean, there's a reason I have revolvers tattooed on my arm, and now I'm shooting them off horses. Like, just a little, like, pistol personality, I guess. And so, like, my feisty songs, I mean, at every single show... [2:21:30] Pretty much every single show, there's a girl fight. [2:21:33] in the pit. Really? Yeah, they just get riled up. Girl fights in your show? They get riled up. I'm telling you, they just get, I mean. I wonder if you have more girl fights than other female singers. I don't know. I bet you do. If every single show, you have a girl. Almost every show. I bet that's real odd. [2:21:50] Have you talked to other female singers? Do they have similar stories? I haven't asked. How many girls about your show, though? Yeah, you should ask. You should totally ask. Because it's like towards this part where it's like, I call it my ramp up. It's like gunpowder and lead, little red wagon, mama's broken heart. And like they just start getting wound up. Yeah, they think about their ex. That motherfucker. Or he's there and they're fine. It's just a lot. And he's there with another woman. And I have a front row seat to it. I'll stop if it gets real bad. I'll just stop and go, hey, y'all. Tone her down a little bit.

[2:22:20] Really? Every show? Almost every show. That's really odd, Miranda. [2:22:24] I know. I think that's odd. I think that might be a very specific reaction that you have. [2:22:30] on people [2:22:31] Maybe I need, I mean, now, and I'm pretty calm now. I'm like, it's all right. We got some ballots coming up. Everybody take a sip. Take a seat. Y'all settle down. I think it's great. They're feeling something. Yeah. Yeah. Bringing out emotion. Yeah. That's my job. 100%. [2:22:47] Yeah, I bet it's great at the gym, those songs. Yeah. I think about that bitch they punch at the concert. Right, right. You know that elliptical machine? I have a lot of those like, girl, you're my bitch, like those kind of girls. Yeah. And I love it. I love that. Yeah, that's awesome. That's awesome. Yeah, you can't buy that. That's a weird feeling. It is. Yeah, you have to earn that feeling. You'll have to come to a show that's like. [2:23:10] one that I know for sure is going to be one of those. I would love to. I would love to. Watcher of the stage. I loved you at the Makane event. It was amazing. That's such a cool event, too. It's such a good event. And I love all those boys. And Jack and I. I mean, Jack Ingram is one of my heroes from back in the day. I started watching him when I was 15, and he had such charisma. And that's why I'd be like, I want to do that. Oh, really? That's awesome. I've known him for a really long time. It's such a cool thing when you're going to an event like that, [2:23:40] great cause. So everybody's like super positive about why they're there. It's not just to have fun. It's also, it does like such an amazing service for people. [2:23:50] It does. And they do such a good job with that show. They do. It's put together so well.

[2:23:54] You know who blew me away at that show, too? Is Lucas. Yeah, he's great. Woo! I love him. He is great. People are like, oh, it's Willie Nelson's son. I'm like, oh, okay, that'll be cool. And then he started singing. I was like, holy shit! [2:24:07] Like this guy's fucking great. He's great. He's not just good. He's great. Great musician. And he's a great guy. Sweetheart. He's a sweetheart. Super sweetheart. Yeah. [2:24:19] Yeah, I've had the pleasure of getting to know him now. He's a really nice guy. I love him. A genuine nice guy. But God, can he say. He can. Especially when he does that soul stuff. When he really leans into the soul, more soul stuff, it just makes him shine. Yeah. Because it's just so different than what people would think it was going to be. Right. You know? Right. [2:24:38] And his pipes. Yeah. Woo! Woo! [2:24:40] when the notes he hissed i was like and when he goes for he like sings with his body like his whole body like you know he's going for it and i love it yeah and he does this like i don't know it's gonna hurt later in life but he does this like back bend thing he's on his knees he's like bent all the way back playing a guitar solo and i'm like girl how does he do that is that adrenaline or what is that stretching yeah it's just stretching [2:25:03] Yeah, I could probably do that, like, [2:25:05] a decade ago not now i bet you could i'm not gonna try well not on stage well you must have core strength to be on that horse when you're shooting at things yeah you know what helps is pilates oh i'm sure like i ride so much better when i'm doing like consistent pilates i did pilates once with my wife i was like oh it's hard shit a lot harder

[2:25:25] It's like yoga in a way that people think, oh, yoga, you're just going and stretching. No, no, no. Go do it. It's fucking hard. It's hard. And Pilates is hard. I was like, oh, this is weird. This is using weird muscles. Yeah, like shaky ones. [2:25:40] You're like, why am I shaking? Yeah, like stabilizing muscles. But it's like a really good thing to balance out other stuff. [2:25:47] But that would definitely improve your core strength and allow you to be able to... When I first started riding, I was like... [2:25:54] I'm still not great and I still have fear, you know, on a horse like I'm just not super comfortable. [2:25:59] all the time, you know, when we're going fast. So I'm just learning to work up to that. But when I first started riding, I didn't start riding a horse ever until I was 30 years old. And [2:26:08] I wish I'd started at four when I was fearless. You know what I mean? Right. But starting at 30, like... [2:26:13] getting on this giant animal and you don't know what you're doing. And my trainer at the time was like, you need to do Pilates. And so I started Pilates and it really helped me. Like it helped, helped me like stabilize myself a little more. That's interesting. Your trainer told you to do Pilates to help horse riding. She was my, she was training my horses and teaching me how to ride. She was like, you do not have core strength at all. You need to go do Pilates. That's interesting that you would choose that. [2:26:38] Huh. I guess that makes sense. But I would think that there's other stuff you could do, too. Like those – you ever see what a BOSU ball is? Oh, yeah. You know what those things are? Like standing on that ball with a flat bottom to it where you, like, bounce. Yes. And they have this – [2:26:52] it's like this saddle you sit on and it's for that. Like, and it, it's like, it's almost like one of those balls, but saddle you sit on. Like if you're sitting on a yoga ball, but it's a saddle. And I like, like my shooting coach, Kenda, my friend, Kenda, she'll tell me, get your gun belt on and get your guns out and sit on your,

[2:27:10] Is that the yoga ball, the big one? Mm-hmm. The big workout ball? Mm-hmm. Sit on that and shoot off that. That makes sense. Like when you're doing your drills or whatever. Because you've got to stabilize. Mm-hmm. It's all just about stabilizing. Yeah. [2:27:20] No, I know a lot of people that sit at their desk on one of those. Yeah, which is smart. I guess. [2:27:26] I'm glad I don't have to sit at a desk. I don't think I'd do well. Well, I have to sit at this desk. But these chairs, they keep you upright. These are really good. Yeah, they're comfy. They're good. [2:27:34] They make you sit correctly or at least encourage you to sit correctly rather than a... But when you started doing that when you were 30, how long did it take before you started shooting guns off of a horse? I just started that last year. Oh, okay. I mean, I just started last year. I showed Gypsy Vanners their, like... [2:27:51] draft, lazy draft horses, kind of. I got into those because I was 30 and like [2:27:57] I can't afford to get hurt. Like, I'm on the road all the time. So I wanted something safe to learn on. Have you fallen before? Oh, yeah. Fallen up 100 times. Really? Yeah. [2:28:06] I mean, I tried to do Hunter Jumper. I thought I wanted to be... [2:28:10] I was all excited. I'm like, I'm going to be a cowgirl at 30 years old. I'm like, I'm going to finally be a cowgirl. I want a barrel race. Well, then I learned that I didn't want a barrel race, which kind of the guns, it's patterns, and it's going fast around. You have to go around a barrel. So kind of back to that, but this old cowboy thing. [2:28:26] trainer where I got my first horse, he was like, you need to go take English lessons because you need your fundamentals because you can't, you're not just going to get a Western saddle and act like you know what you're doing. Go take lessons because English is so proper. What is English? English and like, it's like the hunter jumpers, like the dressage. It's like the very proper, you know, English writing is teaches you the fundamentals. Look, I'm sitting up straight here talking about, um, to where Western is a lot more loose. And so it's taught me a lot

[2:28:56] English lessons, but I thought I'd do Hunter Jumper, which is like [2:28:59] you know, jumping over the poles. Right. And that's where I really hit the ground a few times. I wasn't ready for that. You know what I mean? Yeah. Just it's been a cool journey. It's just [2:29:10] I mean, it's a lot to learn. [2:29:11] It's a lot to learn. I'm imagining it's also like rough on the body too. [2:29:17] Yeah, it is. [2:29:18] That's why I'm like... [2:29:19] Give me your safe. Cool, my horse. He is super safe. I just... I don't... [2:29:25] I want to learn really badly and I want to grow and be better, but I don't want to do it at a certain cost. Do you enter competitions or anything? I showed my vanners for 10 years. What does that mean? I just went to horse shows. You said some words I don't understand. Gypsy vanners. I showed my vanners. My vanners. My vanners. [2:29:43] That sounds... [2:29:44] dirty when you say it back like that. What's a vanner? No, it's my gypsy vanners are the kind of horses I have. So I went and showed them in competitions, like just English pleasure, Western pleasure, like just riding around the rail and it's about your technique and it's not like jumping or anything. [2:30:04] So it's just about... [2:30:06] Being in control of the horse. Yep, it's your technique. Making the horse listen to you. Yeah. And then... [2:30:13] And then I got into the shooting and I'm not going back. Are you going to do competitions with the shooting? I did one last year just to get my first one out of the way. And it was fun. I mean, it's scary. It's scary as shit, honestly. But all these girls I ride with are so good. They go 100 miles an hour.

[2:30:31] Like, I got to show you, Kenda. Like, she is. Is there a video of her? Yeah, she's amazing. What's her last name? Lonsane. It's L-A-N-E. [2:30:39] S-E-S-I-E-N-G. [2:30:42] Google it. I'm spelling her wrong. Gmail farmed it. She's amazing. They go so fast. And like... [2:30:49] It's a timed event, right? So you're competing just against you, really, like how precise and how fast you can go on your horse. So you have like a green light and then you go? Green light, you go. How do they start you off? Do they... [2:31:04] You do? [2:31:04] What do they say? [2:31:05] A flag? [2:31:07] Oh, they drop a flag and then you go? And then you go. Oh. I didn't go that fast. I did mine in like 28 seconds. She does it in like... [2:31:15] Eight seconds. Whoa. Like seven seconds. Same course? Yeah. Oh, my God. It's insane. She's amazing. But – [2:31:21] But that's something to work towards. How many times has she wiped out? Oh, she's broke down as hell. She's broke down. She has cowgirl broke down, but she's still going. She wiped out so bad last year and just gets right back on. [2:31:34] keeps going riding in a cast like it's cowgirl way riding in a cast that's tough they're tough yeah people are built different they are you got any videos [2:31:45] Here we go. I want to see this. [2:31:47] She's awesome. [2:31:48] Because I saw that you were doing that. I was like, that's bananas. That's bananas. [2:31:52] But it looks like fun. It is fun. Do they have one of those where they do bow and arrow? [2:31:57] They have bow and arrow. [2:31:58] There she is. [2:31:59] Oh, here she goes. They have...

[2:32:01] Bow and arrows. Woo! Rifles. The rifles are crazy. Imagine this lady running up to you on a ranch with a pistol in her hand. She is legit crazy. [2:32:15] That's crazy. She's one of my besties. [2:32:18] Is there a high speed where they're not showing it? Here it goes. [2:32:21] Oh, wow. [2:32:25] That's crazy. [2:32:26] Oh, man, this is awesome. She is a literal never misses. Oh, now I get it. Okay, this looks like fun. There's 83 patterns. [2:32:35] So the horse never runs the same... [2:32:37] Wait a minute. [2:32:38] How is she shooting that many times? [2:32:42] It's five shots and a gun change. Oh, you have to change your gun? You have to change your gun, yeah. So how many shots is it total in one of these rounds where you run? [2:32:51] Ten. Ten. So, okay. So you have ten things. This is like a highlight reel, but yeah. Ten shots. Ten shots. [2:32:57] But, yeah, so that's my bestie who's teaching me how to do it. That's awesome. Yeah. Well, [2:33:02] That's how to learn. She's awesome. Learn from a psycho. Exactly. She looks completely insane. You've got to have a serious screw loose to be good at that. Wow. Yeah. Oh, my God. Look at this dude. [2:33:14] Oh, this is her. [2:33:16] That's her and Charles. Wow. Oh, yeah. How about your Kinder? 12 and 0. 7, 0. [2:33:27] I don't know what those numbers mean, but it looks awesome. [2:33:30] It looks like fun. Yeah, it's really fun.

[2:33:32] Thank you. [2:33:32] And it's... [2:33:35] I don't know. [2:33:36] It's a very country thing to be involved in. Well, guess what? There you go. [2:33:41] Guess what, Joe? I mean, it's perfect. It's perfect for you. We talked about chickens. We talked about dogs. We talked about guns on horses. Archery. Hunting. Yeah. Fill in the blank. Tito's and Tito's. Yeah, exactly. That's a very, but that's a very country activity because it's not just horse riding. It's horse riding with pistols. Yeah, I mean, come on. Yeah. Yeah. [2:34:02] I love it. It's funny that I didn't know that that was such a big thing. See if there's one where they do it off with bows and arrows. I want to see that. It's crazy. I haven't seen that in person, but the rifles. Oh, rifles they do too? They do it with rifles. That makes sense. And you don't have reins. That makes sense. [2:34:19] Because you use two hands to shoot the ruffle. Right. So, like, they're riding with their legs. Whoa. Right? Right. And the horse is making wild turns. Yeah. So you have to crazy strength in your legs to... [2:34:29] Pat needs a lot of Pilates. Oh, yeah. [2:34:32] So you can find one where they're doing it bows and arrows. [2:34:35] because I know that that's how the Mongols did it. That's how the Comanches did it. [2:34:39] They learned how to shoot while they were – they learned how to time the release of their arrow while the horse was in the air. [2:34:46] They had the least amount of disturbance. [2:34:49] Thank you. [2:34:50] Something like that. Hold on. [2:34:52] What is this one? Epic Equestrian Mounted Archery. [2:34:57] But is this a competition? I mean, I don't know that there's many of them. [2:35:01] I don't know that there's a... Oh, yeah, so they have targets. Yeah, but this looks like a... British horseback archery. See, that's a... She's in a dressage saddle doing that.

[2:35:10] Oh, yeah, look at this. [2:35:12] The guy's got the crazy mongrel hat on, too. [2:35:17] Oh, that makes it look at that. [2:35:19] That's cool. [2:35:21] Is that your next hobby? No. I don't fuck with horses. [2:35:27] It's just... [2:35:28] I like them. I love them. I think they're awesome. I don't want to ride them. There you go. There's a little thing for it. Oh, that's cool. That's like a pattern. Yeah, so very similar. Similar kind of deal. Taren Tactical for horses. Yeah. Exactly. Exactly. Taren Tactical is a tactical range in California. That's where Keanu Reeves learned how to shoot guns. I used to go there when I lived in California. You'd do it like, shoot already. Deet. Yeah. And you'd go through a tactical course. That's where we shoot out in Tocqueville is... [2:35:57] It's called Ben Avery Shooting Facility, and it's like all of that. Anything that can be shot is shot there. Yeah. So Kenda had them build a rodeo arena so we could – [2:36:08] do our balloons. [2:36:09] That would be the coolest thing to have on your property. Yeah. To have a tactical range right on your property. Cool. [2:36:15] we could train and practice. This place is huge and it's out there in the desert so like there's plenty of space to do all the things. [2:36:20] That's what I was thinking about, that shooting pistols on the horses, like – [2:36:24] When did they figure out to not use bullets? [2:36:27] Something happened. Something happened. And the horses wear earplugs too, which is great. They probably had to figure that out later in life too. Horses wear earplugs. But when did they figure out, how many people got shot before they realized, hey, we probably shouldn't be using real bullets to shoot these balloons. Yeah. Black powder might be a better call. Because you got all those people in the audience and then you got someone on the horse. It is. And she catches hell for it. People are like, you can't be. She's like, it's spectator safe. It's...

[2:36:54] Save for the horses. Everybody wears earplugs. It's black powder. Who gets mad? People. Everybody wants to bitch about something. Right. You know. But that's just how it's going. You would know more than anyone. I don't need to tell you. You can't make everybody happy. It's impossible. No, you can't. And you're always going to make someone mad. [2:37:12] As long as you relay that, you'll be okay. Yeah. [2:37:15] And as long as you stay offline. Yeah. Stay off that TikTok. Stay out of that river, that TikTok river. [2:37:20] Thank you. [2:37:21] Yeah. [2:37:23] A lot of people drown in that river. Yeah. Yeah. [2:37:26] Yeah. [2:37:27] Anything else you want to talk about? Should we wrap this up? Yeah. I mean, we talked about every country thing you can talk about. We basically did. Listen, you're really fun to talk to. I really enjoyed it. Thank you for having me on here. My pleasure. I really appreciate it. And I love your music, and I love your personality, so it was really cool to have you in here. Well, come see us on the road. I would love to. Love to have you. Are you ever in Austin soon? I'm playing the San Antonio Rodeo next year. When is that? [2:37:47] What time? February. Oh, okay. So like in a couple of months. Yeah. Okay. We'll try to make it down for that. Are you ever in Austin though? I haven't played in Austin in a long time. Really? I don't know why. Yeah. [2:37:57] I'm here all the time and... [2:37:58] I don't know. I need to get that on the books. [2:38:01] Okay. Well, I will come. I will definitely come. Well, thank you. Thank you. Thanks for having me. My pleasure. If anybody wants to go find you out on the river, social media on the river. I'm on all your social media platforms. You're on all that stuff? MirandaFambert.com. Okay. Thank you very much. Bye, everybody.

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